Announcement for the Bored (I hate myself so I am getting married)
Comments
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I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
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YellowSnow said:
I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
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Yeah, my mom complains about it.YellowSnow said:
I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
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But your dads love it.backthepack said:
Yeah, my mom complains about it.YellowSnow said:
I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
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Seems to me you both should leave your women and become life partners. Same dynamic but with less risk of failure.theknowledge said:You are the Yin to my Yang.
You are a red man marrying a white woman about to have a pink kid.
I am a white man who married a red woman and have two pink kids.
Welcome to the club brother! -
For the record I'm in my thirties and still will only grow a pedo stache so....Pitchfork51 said:
U lying fuck swayeSwaye said:
This is actually exactly how I picture you two. I'll let you guess who I think has the porn stache.UW_Doog_Bot said:
@backthepack and I confirmed crashing at this point. Don't mind what we slip in the punch bowl. It's all for the best.Swaye said:
You are thinking of PNW Injuns. For our appetizer we are serving roasted grubs, followed by corn, and then buffalo (wings). Open bar stocked only with firewater, and snakes and sparklers for the kiddies. Mescaline doled out in the trailer behind the bowling alley.BleachedAnusDawg said:It took seeing three different references to @Swaye getting married and having a kid for me to click on this announcement. I never pay attention to the announcement threads, and now I am shaking and about to vomit.
Best white man name for Swaye would be Jake. Can't get enough of Jake hawt talk on this board.
What I want to know is if you're upgrading to a two-room teepee with the little one on the way, or maybe even springing for one of those long halls like they have at Tillicum Village?
Can we assume the dinner menu for the wedding reception consists of various corn dishes, smoked salmon, and whale blubber?
You know btp can't grow facial hair -
Disagree.Swaye said:
This may be the funniest line I have ever read here. Criminally underchinned at 17!1to392831weretaken said:Alright. Well, from one retard who's already hit that figurative eject button, here's my biggest tip:
Once that baby's out, keep CLS the fuck away from Facebook and social media in general. That shit is designed in a lab to turn new mothers into competitive, overemotional monsters. Freaking squirrels have babies (and more at a time than humans at that), and yet Facebook convinces every new mother that "the miracle of birth" endows them with mythical hero status. And your alien-looking wiggling skin pile of a baby is the cutest thing on the planet and DEFINITELY already a genius because it pointed at that one thing that one time when the books say that shouldn't happen for another two weeks, but fuck Alice and her shit ugly baby that's too stupid to roll over yet. -
Swaye's life sentence (and
photoshoppingMSPainting pubes onto an OSU rowboat) has been really good for my brand. I'm up to 50.68:1! @UW_Doog_Bot, time to release the rankings, stat! -
My girlfriend hates it.PurpleBaze said:
But your dads love it.backthepack said:
Yeah, my mom complains about it.YellowSnow said:
I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
My dad thinks it’s funny how much it pisses them off.
I don’t really care. -
YKWbackthepack said:
My girlfriend hates it.PurpleBaze said:
But your dads love it.backthepack said:
Yeah, my mom complains about it.YellowSnow said:
I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
My dad thinks it’s funny how much it pisses them off.
I don’t really care. -
Papa Swaye, please to be telling CLS and your future MIL this is how you're doing your gender reveal or else you're not doing a faggy gender reveal.
You win either way.
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Been asking for those nudes for like three months dick.backthepack said:
My girlfriend hates it.PurpleBaze said:
But your dads love it.backthepack said:
Yeah, my mom complains about it.YellowSnow said:
I know what you look like FudgePack and this is not a good look for you, bruh.backthepack said:I have a little pedo stache going on right now. Too lazy to shave hth
My dad thinks it’s funny how much it pisses them off.
I don’t really care. -
Coach Pete just woofed. Pretty sure it was to congratulate Swaye.
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Little kid is like "What does stress me the fuck out mean Grandma?"dnc said:Papa Swaye, please to be telling CLS and your future MIL this is how you're doing your gender reveal or else you're not doing a faggy gender reveal.
You win either way. -
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Nah, mom wasn't even mad. Little man's already heard worse.Swaye said:
Little kid is like "What does stress me the fuck out mean Grandma?"dnc said:Papa Swaye, please to be telling CLS and your future MIL this is how you're doing your gender reveal or else you're not doing a faggy gender reveal.
You win either way. -
Why do you hate West Bellevue?YellowSnow said:
East Queen Anne is the epicenter of competitive mommying in our region.1to392831weretaken said:
I call it "competitive momming." Live in Yuppyville like me, and it's even worse. You're made to feel guilty for not putting your kids in expensive private schools or after-school programs, not getting them the best things, not sacrificing as much as the other mom. I'm so sick of watching my friends' wives climb up on their crosses and then complain about it.dnc said:
This is highly accurate. Also the driver of a ton of unneccessary expenses. Like I said before I lucked out and married a minimalist but if CLS isn’t one, keep her off social media and especially Pinterest.1to392831weretaken said:Alright. Well, from one retard who's already hit that figurative eject button, here's my biggest tip:
Once that baby's out, keep CLS the fuck away from Facebook and social media in general. That shit is designed in a lab to turn new mothers into competitive, overemotional monsters. Freaking squirrels have babies (and more at a time than humans at that), and yet Facebook convinces every new mother that "the miracle of birth" endows them with mythical hero status. And your alien-looking wiggling skin pile of a baby is the cutest thing on the planet and DEFINITELY already a genius because it pointed at that one thing that one time when the books say that shouldn't happen for another two weeks, but fuck Alice and her shit ugly baby that's too stupid to roll over yet. -
In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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Confirmedbackthepack said:In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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I mean he raised you so we don't really have to wait 19 years to solve that mystery.backthepack said:In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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Swaye Sixkiller does have a fucking cool ring to it though right?backthepack said:In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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Well my genetics fucking suck. I could have played basketball at a couple d3 schools thodnc said:
I mean he raised you so we don't really have to wait 19 years to solve that mystery.backthepack said:In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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Name him Sawyer much more likely to be recruited by UW!Swaye said:
Swaye Sixkiller does have a fucking cool ring to it though right?backthepack said:In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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Hopefully Swaye's genetics will give us? a Thorpe Award winnerbackthepack said:
Well my genetics fucking suck. I could have played basketball at a couple d3 schools thodnc said:
I mean he raised you so we don't really have to wait 19 years to solve that mystery.backthepack said:In 2038 I better see your being recruited by UW or you failed as a father.
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CSB Tim.Swaye said:
This is actually exactly how I picture you two. I'll let you guess who I think has the porn stache.UW_Doog_Bot said:
@backthepack and I confirmed crashing at this point. Don't mind what we slip in the punch bowl. It's all for the best.Swaye said:
You are thinking of PNW Injuns. For our appetizer we are serving roasted grubs, followed by corn, and then buffalo (wings). Open bar stocked only with firewater, and snakes and sparklers for the kiddies. Mescaline doled out in the trailer behind the bowling alley.BleachedAnusDawg said:It took seeing three different references to @Swaye getting married and having a kid for me to click on this announcement. I never pay attention to the announcement threads, and now I am shaking and about to vomit.
Best white man name for Swaye would be Jake. Can't get enough of Jake hawt talk on this board.
What I want to know is if you're upgrading to a two-room teepee with the little one on the way, or maybe even springing for one of those long halls like they have at Tillicum Village?
Can we assume the dinner menu for the wedding reception consists of various corn dishes, smoked salmon, and whale blubber?
The first burning man I attended my best friend who is hispanic and looks like a younger skinnier benicio del torro(or at least he used to) dressed up as those two.
I make a pretty damn good Gonzo as well(or used to).
My red car partially broke down along the way and we had to drive the thing under 55 the whole way out there with the windows down. Got pulled over twice while looking like this and were unsurprisingly, completely fucked with by LE. Luckily, we weren't bringing fish to the ocean.
Got to the Burn super late opening night, could not find our camp, and drove our car right up to the man(big no no ever since that guy tried to burn it down early).
So here we are, dressed like Raoul Duke and Dr. Gonzo walking around like glazed over idiots with a partially broken down car, parked at the feet of the man. For the better part of an hour no one bothered us because they assumed we were some kind of performance art or some other ridiculous show because of how on point our costumes were and we had just rolled with playing it out as these characters bc why not. Finally, the rangers approached us looking somewhat confused and a bit impressed to tell us unless we had a permit we would need to move the car. We dutifully comply and decide, fuck it, what do we need camp for anyways? we aren't going to bed so we park the car in some alley.
No shit, we end up finding the "bat country" bar and walk into a room of 30 other Dukes and Gonzos. All of them also in character. I can tell you that the only thing that made this not such a massive mind-fuck was the fact that 1)I was at burning man so who the fuck knows what's normal and 2) I was so intoxicated and in character at this point there were no fucks given to anything. The various Dukes and Gonzo's provide us with all the fish we can eat and all the booze we can drink. Then we decide that it is a good idea to walk out to the trash fence(the boundary of the festival which is almost a mile out into the nothing of the black rock desert) while all fucked up so that we can look at all the stars. We were somewhere around Blackrock, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold.
It takes us so long to get out there and we have nothing to eat or drink except our booze and these chocolates given to us at Bat Country. A real prisoners dilemma of I'm hungry and thirsty but should I really eat or drink any more of this? So by the time we make it out to this stupid orange fence in the middle of nowhere it's already starting to be sunrise. It then begins to dawn on us we will be a mile out in this space moon desert, already dehydrated, with no water, in rapidly rising heat, with only a vague recollection of where we parked the car to head to anyways. That's when the fear began to take hold. My friend starts freaking out and talking about how we are going to die in the desert. Like really panicking with hyperventilation and everything. I'm trying to keep my shit together and not lose it too while at the same time attempting to calm him down when we start to hear it, this thumping from waaaayyyy out in the emptiness. It totally takes our focus and we are just sitting there staring as a giant angler fish comes rolling out of the dust.
"Hey! Do you guys need a ride?"
"Fuck Yeeeeessss God pleeeeeeasssee." We start to dance like idiots.
"Well you should have thought of that before you came all the way out here with no water you fucking idiots." as the car drives past us.
We are totally stunned and still as statues staring at the fish and then eachother. "Oh fuck, we really are fucked aren't we?" is all I can think.
The car stops about 50ft past us. "Well come on you wankers, we aren't going to let you die out here!"
We run to the car as fast as we can and climb up the stairs from the back of the fish. I hit the floor laughing like a hyena. Everyone wants to know, "What's so funny?"
"We've......*gasp*....just been saved......*gasp*....by a fish's asshole!"
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One toke over the line sweet Jesus, one toke over the line...UW_Doog_Bot said:
CSB Tim.Swaye said:
This is actually exactly how I picture you two. I'll let you guess who I think has the porn stache.UW_Doog_Bot said:
@backthepack and I confirmed crashing at this point. Don't mind what we slip in the punch bowl. It's all for the best.Swaye said:
You are thinking of PNW Injuns. For our appetizer we are serving roasted grubs, followed by corn, and then buffalo (wings). Open bar stocked only with firewater, and snakes and sparklers for the kiddies. Mescaline doled out in the trailer behind the bowling alley.BleachedAnusDawg said:It took seeing three different references to @Swaye getting married and having a kid for me to click on this announcement. I never pay attention to the announcement threads, and now I am shaking and about to vomit.
Best white man name for Swaye would be Jake. Can't get enough of Jake hawt talk on this board.
What I want to know is if you're upgrading to a two-room teepee with the little one on the way, or maybe even springing for one of those long halls like they have at Tillicum Village?
Can we assume the dinner menu for the wedding reception consists of various corn dishes, smoked salmon, and whale blubber?
The first burning man I attended my best friend who is hispanic and looks like a younger skinnier benicio del torro(or at least he used to) dressed up as those two.
I make a pretty damn good Gonzo as well(or used to).
My red car partially broke down along the way and we had to drive the thing under 55 the whole way out there with the windows down. Got pulled over twice while looking like this and were unsurprisingly, completely fucked with by LE. Luckily, we weren't bringing fish to the ocean.
Got to the Burn super late opening night, could not find our camp, and drove our car right up to the man(big no no ever since that guy tried to burn it down early).
So here we are, dressed like Raoul Duke and Dr. Gonzo walking around like glazed over idiots with a partially broken down car, parked at the feet of the man. For the better part of an hour no one bothered us because they assumed we were some kind of performance art or some other ridiculous show because of how on point our costumes were and we had just rolled with playing it out as these characters bc why not. Finally, the rangers approached us looking somewhat confused and a bit impressed to tell us unless we had a permit we would need to move the car. We dutifully comply and decide, fuck it, what do we need camp for anyways? we aren't going to bed so we park the car in some alley.
No shit, we end up finding the "bat country" bar and walk into a room of 30 other Dukes and Gonzos. All of them also in character. I can tell you that the only thing that made this not such a massive mind-fuck was the fact that 1)I was at burning man so who the fuck knows what's normal and 2) I was so intoxicated and in character at this point there were no fucks given to anything. The various Dukes and Gonzo's provide us with all the fish we can eat and all the booze we can drink. Then we decide that it is a good idea to walk out to the trash fence(the boundary of the festival which is almost a mile out into the nothing of the black rock desert) while all fucked up so that we can look at all the stars. We were somewhere around Blackrock, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold.
It takes us so long to get out there and we have nothing to eat or drink except our booze and these chocolates given to us at Bat Country. A real prisoners dilemma of I'm hungry and thirsty but should I really eat or drink any more of this? So by the time we make it out to this stupid orange fence in the middle of nowhere it's already starting to be sunrise. It then begins to dawn on us we will be a mile out in this space moon desert, already dehydrated, with no water, in rapidly rising heat, with only a vague recollection of where we parked the car to head to anyways. That's when the fear began to take hold. My friend starts freaking out and talking about how we are going to die in the desert. Like really panicking with hyperventilation and everything. I'm trying to keep my shit together and not lose it too while at the same time attempting to calm him down when we start to hear it, this thumping from waaaayyyy out in the emptiness. It totally takes our focus and we are just sitting there staring as a giant angler fish comes rolling out of the dust.
"Hey! Do you guys need a ride?"
"Fuck Yeeeeessss God pleeeeeeasssee." We start to dance like idiots.
"Well you should have thought of that before you came all the way out here with no water you fucking idiots." as the car drives past us.
We are totally stunned and still as statues staring at the fish and then eachother. "Oh fuck, we really are fucked aren't we?" is all I can think.
The car stops about 50ft past us. "Well come on you wankers, we aren't going to let you die out here!"
We run to the car as fast as we can and climb up the stairs from the back of the fish. I hit the floor laughing like a hyena. Everyone wants to know, "What's so funny?"
"We've......*gasp*....just been saved......*gasp*....by a fish's asshole!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2pgWsYSyUA -
If you look closely in the background of that South Park gif, there's a gal having an awfully good time with herself...
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You’ll need to describe it for Grandpa Sankey.1to392831weretaken said:If you look closely in the background of that South Park gif, there's a gal having an awfully good time with herself...
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This really could have been it's own thread.UW_Doog_Bot said:
CSB Tim.Swaye said:
This is actually exactly how I picture you two. I'll let you guess who I think has the porn stache.UW_Doog_Bot said:
@backthepack and I confirmed crashing at this point. Don't mind what we slip in the punch bowl. It's all for the best.Swaye said:
You are thinking of PNW Injuns. For our appetizer we are serving roasted grubs, followed by corn, and then buffalo (wings). Open bar stocked only with firewater, and snakes and sparklers for the kiddies. Mescaline doled out in the trailer behind the bowling alley.BleachedAnusDawg said:It took seeing three different references to @Swaye getting married and having a kid for me to click on this announcement. I never pay attention to the announcement threads, and now I am shaking and about to vomit.
Best white man name for Swaye would be Jake. Can't get enough of Jake hawt talk on this board.
What I want to know is if you're upgrading to a two-room teepee with the little one on the way, or maybe even springing for one of those long halls like they have at Tillicum Village?
Can we assume the dinner menu for the wedding reception consists of various corn dishes, smoked salmon, and whale blubber?
The first burning man I attended my best friend who is hispanic and looks like a younger skinnier benicio del torro(or at least he used to) dressed up as those two.
I make a pretty damn good Gonzo as well(or used to).
My red car partially broke down along the way and we had to drive the thing under 55 the whole way out there with the windows down. Got pulled over twice while looking like this and were unsurprisingly, completely fucked with by LE. Luckily, we weren't bringing fish to the ocean.
Got to the Burn super late opening night, could not find our camp, and drove our car right up to the man(big no no ever since that guy tried to burn it down early).
So here we are, dressed like Raoul Duke and Dr. Gonzo walking around like glazed over idiots with a partially broken down car, parked at the feet of the man. For the better part of an hour no one bothered us because they assumed we were some kind of performance art or some other ridiculous show because of how on point our costumes were and we had just rolled with playing it out as these characters bc why not. Finally, the rangers approached us looking somewhat confused and a bit impressed to tell us unless we had a permit we would need to move the car. We dutifully comply and decide, fuck it, what do we need camp for anyways? we aren't going to bed so we park the car in some alley.
No shit, we end up finding the "bat country" bar and walk into a room of 30 other Dukes and Gonzos. All of them also in character. I can tell you that the only thing that made this not such a massive mind-fuck was the fact that 1)I was at burning man so who the fuck knows what's normal and 2) I was so intoxicated and in character at this point there were no fucks given to anything. The various Dukes and Gonzo's provide us with all the fish we can eat and all the booze we can drink. Then we decide that it is a good idea to walk out to the trash fence(the boundary of the festival which is almost a mile out into the nothing of the black rock desert) while all fucked up so that we can look at all the stars. We were somewhere around Blackrock, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold.
It takes us so long to get out there and we have nothing to eat or drink except our booze and these chocolates given to us at Bat Country. A real prisoners dilemma of I'm hungry and thirsty but should I really eat or drink any more of this? So by the time we make it out to this stupid orange fence in the middle of nowhere it's already starting to be sunrise. It then begins to dawn on us we will be a mile out in this space moon desert, already dehydrated, with no water, in rapidly rising heat, with only a vague recollection of where we parked the car to head to anyways. That's when the fear began to take hold. My friend starts freaking out and talking about how we are going to die in the desert. Like really panicking with hyperventilation and everything. I'm trying to keep my shit together and not lose it too while at the same time attempting to calm him down when we start to hear it, this thumping from waaaayyyy out in the emptiness. It totally takes our focus and we are just sitting there staring as a giant angler fish comes rolling out of the dust.
"Hey! Do you guys need a ride?"
"Fuck Yeeeeessss God pleeeeeeasssee." We start to dance like idiots.
"Well you should have thought of that before you came all the way out here with no water you fucking idiots." as the car drives past us.
We are totally stunned and still as statues staring at the fish and then eachother. "Oh fuck, we really are fucked aren't we?" is all I can think.
The car stops about 50ft past us. "Well come on you wankers, we aren't going to let you die out here!"
We run to the car as fast as we can and climb up the stairs from the back of the fish. I hit the floor laughing like a hyena. Everyone wants to know, "What's so funny?"
"We've......*gasp*....just been saved......*gasp*....by a fish's asshole!" -
Greatest thread of all time
