I played in the Seattle Mens League ran by Slick Watts and co pre-Covid
Was in the second division and did well so our team got bumped up to the first one
Got a train ran on us by Rodney Stuckey and friends
Not a cool story, just wanted to say I wouldve dunked on Tequila at the IMA
My crew regularly played with dudes like Nate/Will, Deon Brown, and others that played overseas ... let’s just say we held our own
Until you've been tea-bagged by Shag Williams, you haven't really balled.
The last "organized" hoop game I was in, I jumped a screen and got tea bagged by a cat that got bounced from USC. I was 35, and rode off into the sunset...
My last game I was 53 or 54, feeling cocky and thought it would be a great idea to run with former high school players home for college winter break. I broke.
I played in the Seattle Mens League ran by Slick Watts and co pre-Covid
Was in the second division and did well so our team got bumped up to the first one
Got a train ran on us by Rodney Stuckey and friends
Not a cool story, just wanted to say I wouldve dunked on Tequila at the IMA
My crew regularly played with dudes like Nate/Will, Deon Brown, and others that played overseas ... let’s just say we held our own
Until you've been tea-bagged by Shag Williams, you haven't really balled.
The last "organized" hoop game I was in, I jumped a screen and got tea bagged by a cat that got bounced from USC. I was 35, and rode off into the sunset...
My last game I was 53 or 54, feeling cocky and thought it would be a great idea to run with former high school players home for college winter break. I broke.
I came out of retirement once coaching high school kids circa age 45 or 46 and tried to go up and down. That was fuckingly stupid. Damned near ended up having to call 911 and get the paddles out.
One other time for a benefit alumni game. That was equally fucking stupid. Told them I'd play for ONE minute and that was going to be it. The other fuckers conspired against me and left me in the game. At four minutes, the entire bench was rolling over laughing at the walk up the court - both offense and defense. Fuck that.
Since we are on the tea bagging story. I literally got tea bagged on an alley oop from Aaron miles to antone jerrell from Jefferson when I was in high school. I had no clue what was going on when miles stopped like 40 feet from the hoop and put up what my dumbass thought was a shot. It wasn’t and nuts flew across my face en route to a thunderous two and tomahawk dunk. Csb I know.
Similar situation happened to me but with worse results ...
Somebody tried to throw an alley oop to Jamaica Willis and I looked at it like what a terrible shot only to get side swiped by Willis trying to go get it
1) It was a TERRIBLE pass
2) Jamaun didn’t have the hops to think about going to get it
Anyway, next think I know Chris Juergens grabs my arms from behind allowing Willis to punch me in the back of the head because I was threatening his NFL career (he was a RS Frosh I believe at that point). Pretty sure I had a good concussion because there was definitely a headache for a 4-7 days afterwards but who cared about concussions then?
I ended up being ok with Willis after a while once I think reality sat in and he wasn’t going to be a NFL player. Never had an issue with him after that point either as it was just done afterwards.
Now Chris Juergens, fuck that mother fucker still to this day. While I don’t agree with what Jamaun did I at least can respect someone being upset in his shoes. But to not be directly involved in the incident and come up to the person from behind to set someone up for being linked, fuck that. In my book that’s far more criminal.
I definitely earned some of the hot water I got into on the court ... this was an instance though I didn’t earn it at all.
Other than that, I was always smart enough to get out of the way before someone dunked ... I never really had the hops to get up to the rim so if I couldn’t get you before you got up I wasn’t going to do anything about it. For better or worse, I never subscribed to the 18-25 year old logic that if you embarrassed me that I needed to try to hurt you.
True story. Back in 95 a buddy and I are at the Phoenix Underground and we bump into Shawn Kemp. We buy him a drink and he won't let us pay and he buys us a round, and opens a tab. After several rounds we're all in the bag, ragging each other, and out of the blue, I challenge Kemp to meet us the next morning and play on 9 foot hoops. I said I'd probably lose but I'd dunk on him at least once. He laffed. CSB
Since we are on the tea bagging story. I literally got tea bagged on an alley oop from Aaron miles to antone jerrell from Jefferson when I was in high school. I had no clue what was going on when miles stopped like 40 feet from the hoop and put up what my dumbass thought was a shot. It wasn’t and nuts flew across my face en route to a thunderous two and tomahawk dunk. Csb I know.
See, self depreciating stories like these with nuts hitting faces are way more enjoyable than Teq talking about how seriously he took his intramural games.
True story. Back in 95 a buddy and I are at the Phoenix Underground and we bump into Shawn Kemp. We buy him a drink and he won't let us pay and he buys us a round, and opens a tab. After several rounds we're all in the bag, ragging each other, and out of the blue, I challenge Kemp to meet us the next morning and play on 9 foot hoops. I said I'd probably lose but I'd dunk on him at least once. He laffed. CSB
Let's be real. Great story. I liked it. But Shawn kemp would absolutely not allow you to dunk on him unless he allowed it. He would hard foul you if he had to and send you flying like discarded food scraps into a recycling bin ...
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One other time for a benefit alumni game. That was equally fucking stupid. Told them I'd play for ONE minute and that was going to be it. The other fuckers conspired against me and left me in the game. At four minutes, the entire bench was rolling over laughing at the walk up the court - both offense and defense. Fuck that.
I remember my comeback phase
Somebody tried to throw an alley oop to Jamaica Willis and I looked at it like what a terrible shot only to get side swiped by Willis trying to go get it
1) It was a TERRIBLE pass
2) Jamaun didn’t have the hops to think about going to get it
Anyway, next think I know Chris Juergens grabs my arms from behind allowing Willis to punch me in the back of the head because I was threatening his NFL career (he was a RS Frosh I believe at that point). Pretty sure I had a good concussion because there was definitely a headache for a 4-7 days afterwards but who cared about concussions then?
I ended up being ok with Willis after a while once I think reality sat in and he wasn’t going to be a NFL player. Never had an issue with him after that point either as it was just done afterwards.
Now Chris Juergens, fuck that mother fucker still to this day. While I don’t agree with what Jamaun did I at least can respect someone being upset in his shoes. But to not be directly involved in the incident and come up to the person from behind to set someone up for being linked, fuck that. In my book that’s far more criminal.
I definitely earned some of the hot water I got into on the court ... this was an instance though I didn’t earn it at all.
Other than that, I was always smart enough to get out of the way before someone dunked ... I never really had the hops to get up to the rim so if I couldn’t get you before you got up I wasn’t going to do anything about it. For better or worse, I never subscribed to the 18-25 year old logic that if you embarrassed me that I needed to try to hurt you.
Shawn kemp? ...
Yes.
That's the funniest thing I've heard in awhile.
Let's be real. Great story. I liked it. But Shawn kemp would absolutely not allow you to dunk on him unless he allowed it. He would hard foul you if he had to and send you flying like discarded food scraps into a recycling bin ...
Put his big foot against my throat pinning me up against the wall