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Apple Cup Adventure: AKA Fuck Thanksgiving My Life Sucks

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    TierbsHsotBoobsTierbsHsotBoobs Member Posts: 39,680
    Combo Breaker 5 Up Votes 5 Awesomes First Anniversary
    Swaye said:

    Swaye said:

    It's almost 4am and I'm pissing sideways!

    Clutch!
    Thanks for the positive words, but to be honest, she's a 29 year old slut. I'm probably lucky number 50 to climb up in that. Met for dinner, had food and drinks, could barely get the check paid she wanted to get back to her place so fast. Which was good, because she is sort of boring. Smash it twice at her place, and I gotta say, not the best. Super hot chick. Fantastic body, really pretty face, great ass and huge tits. But just sort of meh in the sack. As @BearsWiin would say, nothing special.

    I'm never let down when I get laid, but this was probably the worst lay in the last three or four years. Made even worse by the fact that she is so damn good to look at. It's like a Ferrari with a Ford Focus engine transplant. You walk up to it thinking you will have the time of your life, and then you drive it and it's lame.

    I think the best solution is to go out with her one more time while CLS and I are "just dating," and make sure I didn't misread anything. If she sucks next time, drop her like a bag of bricks.

    Worst part? No blowie. Chicks really need to know if they won't go down about the best they can score on a scale of 1 to 10 is a 5. And they drop from there. Meh. Was nice to see those huge tits naked I guess. Really needed the hummer though.

    image
    You know why
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    SwayeSwaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,062
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    Swaye said:

    Swaye said:

    It's almost 4am and I'm pissing sideways!

    Clutch!
    Thanks for the positive words, but to be honest, she's a 29 year old slut. I'm probably lucky number 50 to climb up in that. Met for dinner, had food and drinks, could barely get the check paid she wanted to get back to her place so fast. Which was good, because she is sort of boring. Smash it twice at her place, and I gotta say, not the best. Super hot chick. Fantastic body, really pretty face, great ass and huge tits. But just sort of meh in the sack. As @BearsWiin would say, nothing special.

    I'm never let down when I get laid, but this was probably the worst lay in the last three or four years. Made even worse by the fact that she is so damn good to look at. It's like a Ferrari with a Ford Focus engine transplant. You walk up to it thinking you will have the time of your life, and then you drive it and it's lame.

    I think the best solution is to go out with her one more time while CLS and I are "just dating," and make sure I didn't misread anything. If she sucks next time, drop her like a bag of bricks.

    Worst part? No blowie. Chicks really need to know if they won't go down about the best they can score on a scale of 1 to 10 is a 5. And they drop from there. Meh. Was nice to see those huge tits naked I guess. Really needed the hummer though.

    image
    You know why
    Check the 'Wam you ingrate.
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    AZDuckAZDuck Member Posts: 15,381
    First Anniversary 5 Up Votes 5 Awesomes First Answer
    Swaye said:

    Swaye said:

    Swaye said:

    It's almost 4am and I'm pissing sideways!

    Clutch!
    Thanks for the positive words, but to be honest, she's a 29 year old slut. I'm probably lucky number 50 to climb up in that. Met for dinner, had food and drinks, could barely get the check paid she wanted to get back to her place so fast. Which was good, because she is sort of boring. Smash it twice at her place, and I gotta say, not the best. Super hot chick. Fantastic body, really pretty face, great ass and huge tits. But just sort of meh in the sack. As @BearsWiin would say, nothing special.

    I'm never let down when I get laid, but this was probably the worst lay in the last three or four years. Made even worse by the fact that she is so damn good to look at. It's like a Ferrari with a Ford Focus engine transplant. You walk up to it thinking you will have the time of your life, and then you drive it and it's lame.

    I think the best solution is to go out with her one more time while CLS and I are "just dating," and make sure I didn't misread anything. If she sucks next time, drop her like a bag of bricks.

    Worst part? No blowie. Chicks really need to know if they won't go down about the best they can score on a scale of 1 to 10 is a 5. And they drop from there. Meh. Was nice to see those huge tits naked I guess. Really needed the hummer though.

    image
    You know why
    Check the 'Wam you ingrate.
    I did. Give her some coke or meth and tell her what you want
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    Pitchfork51Pitchfork51 Member Posts: 26,584
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Up Votes Combo Breaker
    I'm cool with 29 year old sluts.
    A bit old.

    It's weird that girls my age are now too old
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    AZDuckAZDuck Member Posts: 15,381
    First Anniversary 5 Up Votes 5 Awesomes First Answer
    Swaye said:

    I'm cool with 29 year old sluts.
    A bit old.

    It's weird that girls my age are now too old

    44 here. 29 is my wheelhouse.

    image
    I got my CLS at 31. She was 23. Worked out good for me.

    Pics already poasted, fuck off
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    SwayeSwaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,062
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker 5 Up Votes 5 Awesomes
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    AZDuck said:

    Swaye said:

    I'm cool with 29 year old sluts.
    A bit old.

    It's weird that girls my age are now too old

    44 here. 29 is my wheelhouse.

    image
    I got my CLS at 31. She was 23. Worked out good for me.

    Pics already poasted, fuck off
    8 years is pretty good. I'm all about 10-15 at my advancing age though. 29-34 seems about perfect. Or 22 if she likes 3 ways.
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    AZDuckAZDuck Member Posts: 15,381
    First Anniversary 5 Up Votes 5 Awesomes First Answer


    AZDuck said:

    Swaye said:

    I'm cool with 29 year old sluts.
    A bit old.

    It's weird that girls my age are now too old

    44 here. 29 is my wheelhouse.

    image
    I got my CLS at 31. She was 23. Worked out good for me.

    Pics already poasted, fuck off
    Is it true all actual duck relationships start with rape?
    Duh
    Swaye said:


    AZDuck said:

    Swaye said:

    I'm cool with 29 year old sluts.
    A bit old.

    It's weird that girls my age are now too old

    44 here. 29 is my wheelhouse.

    image
    I got my CLS at 31. She was 23. Worked out good for me.

    Pics already poasted, fuck off
    Is it true all actual duck relationships start with rape?
    Signs point to yes.

    image
    Where did you get that pic of our first date, you savage?
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    Pitchfork51Pitchfork51 Member Posts: 26,584
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    While you were out banging beaver I stayed home and played a video game. Jerked off too.
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    SwayeSwaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,062
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    While you were out banging beaver I stayed home and played a video game. Jerked off too.

    Need a hand?
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    dannarcdannarc Member Posts: 2,265
    5 Up Votes First Anniversary 5 Awesomes First Comment
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    SwayeSwaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,062
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    dannarc said:

    imageimage

    What are we waiting on?
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    Pitchfork51Pitchfork51 Member Posts: 26,584
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Up Votes Combo Breaker
    dannarc said:

    imageimage

    Well I died a few times but left the difficulty on hard and got about halfway through the game.
    Pretty fun times.

    Then I jerked off to a girl getting railed in the ass.

    You're welcome for the update.

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    Dawgs4everDawgs4ever Member Posts: 170
    First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Up Votes 5 Awesomes
    Swaye said:

    Just got a text from CLS: "Come pick your stuff up"

    Uh oh. She is smart to keep me away from her so I can't give her the old pelvic gyrations to lure her back in. Gravy train may be derailed permanently. Fuck.

    If she isn't willing to forgive you for this, she certainly wasn't going to forgive you for banging hookers at your bachelor party. Getting out now is the right move.
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