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Swaye
Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,738 
I escaped Saudi Arabia after midnight local time last night by clearing immigration and security and boarding a Lufthansa flight bound for Frankfurt, Germany. Landed a few hours ago on an extended layover, and board my next leg to DC in about an hour or so. I didn't get arrested, or probed anally, or drink at all for 9 days. I was in Business flying out and as soon as we took off I ordered 6 Bailey's rocks. Flight attendant looked at me funny, and then brought me 6, as requested. FUCK YEAH!
Anyway, get into Frankfurt and go to clear the passport control/security area for transfers, and get accosted for dates (the fruit like things not the activity) that I packed in from KSA. Anyway, they finally let me keep my delicious fruit thingies, and I was questioned by two total smokeshow 5' 10" blonde haired German female cops. And they both had MP5s strapped around them. I had a boner for the entire round of questioning. No pics, because I didn't want to get shot, but I fucking LOVE Germany.
Sitting in the Lufthansa lounge now about to pack it in, and I am a lame ass and came here to tell you degenerates all about it. Fuck off if you don't like story time. Wish they would have strip searched me. Why I can't I get the anal probe when it is two Heidi Klum look alikes packing SMGs?
Later fags.
Anyway, get into Frankfurt and go to clear the passport control/security area for transfers, and get accosted for dates (the fruit like things not the activity) that I packed in from KSA. Anyway, they finally let me keep my delicious fruit thingies, and I was questioned by two total smokeshow 5' 10" blonde haired German female cops. And they both had MP5s strapped around them. I had a boner for the entire round of questioning. No pics, because I didn't want to get shot, but I fucking LOVE Germany.
Sitting in the Lufthansa lounge now about to pack it in, and I am a lame ass and came here to tell you degenerates all about it. Fuck off if you don't like story time. Wish they would have strip searched me. Why I can't I get the anal probe when it is two Heidi Klum look alikes packing SMGs?
Later fags.
Comments
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This is #MySwaye.
We need more stories dammit. Even though this is a shitty one. Needs moar wombat guernica. -
The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
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I felt very at home when I was in Germany.
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Stay in your lane, Sailor. If you were a 6’6” handsome German American you would have gotten the anal cavity search fer sure.
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brb, yo
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Israeli forces up there too. -
You can’t flag a moderator’s post even when his drink of choice is Bailey’s.
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“Rocks”, breakfast of Champions!BennyBeaver said:You can’t flag a moderator’s post even when his drink of choice is Bailey’s.
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JOOBS!!!!Gilbystaint said:
Israeli forces up there too. -
When you start getting tremens it's best to ease back into the abuse.BennyBeaver said:You can’t flag a moderator’s post even when his drink of choice is Bailey’s.
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That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
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@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
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Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
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Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in. -
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
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Airplane experiences in general suck ass. If you're over 6 feet tall and the flight is over 3 hours it's over. Over the summer I took a 4 hour flight and couldn't walk for a day, despite being in an exit row.backthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
They're crammed and the in-flight experience is just awful. The only redeeming parts are the free movies and the sodas.
And forget about the fucking toilets. A normal, clean shit is bad enough on an airplane. With runs? Fuck that. And the cute stewardesses are always right there. Fuck that shit. -
I’m 6 foot and the 3 hour flight back to school sucks ass. I always end up with the middle seat and want to fucking die.jhfstyle24 said:
Airplane experiences in general suck ass. If you're over 6 feet tall and the flight is over 3 hours it's over. Over the summer I took a 4 hour flight and couldn't walk for a day, despite being in an exit row.backthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
They're crammed and the in-flight experience is just awful. The only redeeming parts are the free movies and the sodas.
And forget about the fucking toilets. A normal, clean shit is bad enough on an airplane. With runs? Fuck that. And the cute stewardesses are always right there. Fuck that shit.
My carry on bag is packed to the brim so I can have enough clothes with me. It’s awful. It limits my leg room by an extra 3-4 feet. -
U r a hoe. Seal needs to beat uSwaye said:I escaped Saudi Arabia after midnight local time last night by clearing immigration and security and boarding a Lufthansa flight bound for Frankfurt, Germany. Landed a few hours ago on an extended layover, and board my next leg to DC in about an hour or so. I didn't get arrested, or probed anally, or drink at all for 9 days. I was in Business flying out and as soon as we took off I ordered 6 Bailey's rocks. Flight attendant looked at me funny, and then brought me 6, as requested. FUCK YEAH!
Anyway, get into Frankfurt and go to clear the passport control/security area for transfers, and get accosted for dates (the fruit like things not the activity) that I packed in from KSA. Anyway, they finally let me keep my delicious fruit thingies, and I was questioned by two total smokeshow 5' 10" blonde haired German female cops. And they both had MP5s strapped around them. I had a boner for the entire round of questioning. No pics, because I didn't want to get shot, but I fucking LOVE Germany.
Sitting in the Lufthansa lounge now about to pack it in, and I am a lame ass and came here to tell you degenerates all about it. Fuck off if you don't like story time. Wish they would have strip searched me. Why I can't I get the anal probe when it is two Heidi Klum look alikes packing SMGs?
Later fags. -
Dirtier than a Dubai portapotty?PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in. -
Quit your belly aching you lil’ wiener. You got know idea of the discrimination I face by the airlines.backthepack said:
I’m 6 foot and the 3 hour flight back to school sucks ass. I always end up with the middle seat and want to fucking die.jhfstyle24 said:
Airplane experiences in general suck ass. If you're over 6 feet tall and the flight is over 3 hours it's over. Over the summer I took a 4 hour flight and couldn't walk for a day, despite being in an exit row.backthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
They're crammed and the in-flight experience is just awful. The only redeeming parts are the free movies and the sodas.
And forget about the fucking toilets. A normal, clean shit is bad enough on an airplane. With runs? Fuck that. And the cute stewardesses are always right there. Fuck that shit.
My carry on bag is packed to the brim so I can have enough clothes with me. It’s awful. It limits my leg room by an extra 3-4 feet. -
Your 6”6 kys.YellowSnow said:
Quit your belly aching you lil’ wiener. You got know idea of the discrimination I face by the airlines.backthepack said:
I’m 6 foot and the 3 hour flight back to school sucks ass. I always end up with the middle seat and want to fucking die.jhfstyle24 said:
Airplane experiences in general suck ass. If you're over 6 feet tall and the flight is over 3 hours it's over. Over the summer I took a 4 hour flight and couldn't walk for a day, despite being in an exit row.backthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
They're crammed and the in-flight experience is just awful. The only redeeming parts are the free movies and the sodas.
And forget about the fucking toilets. A normal, clean shit is bad enough on an airplane. With runs? Fuck that. And the cute stewardesses are always right there. Fuck that shit.
My carry on bag is packed to the brim so I can have enough clothes with me. It’s awful. It limits my leg room by an extra 3-4 feet. -
I'm 6'5, but even at 6' it was fucking shitty.YellowSnow said:
Quit your belly aching you lil’ wiener. You got know idea of the discrimination I face by the airlines.backthepack said:
I’m 6 foot and the 3 hour flight back to school sucks ass. I always end up with the middle seat and want to fucking die.jhfstyle24 said:
Airplane experiences in general suck ass. If you're over 6 feet tall and the flight is over 3 hours it's over. Over the summer I took a 4 hour flight and couldn't walk for a day, despite being in an exit row.backthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
They're crammed and the in-flight experience is just awful. The only redeeming parts are the free movies and the sodas.
And forget about the fucking toilets. A normal, clean shit is bad enough on an airplane. With runs? Fuck that. And the cute stewardesses are always right there. Fuck that shit.
My carry on bag is packed to the brim so I can have enough clothes with me. It’s awful. It limits my leg room by an extra 3-4 feet.
Now it's just a nightmare. And I'm too pour to fly first class or business class to solve this issue. -
Cute humble bragjhfstyle24 said:
I'm 6'5, but even at 6' it was fucking shitty.YellowSnow said:
Quit your belly aching you lil’ wiener. You got know idea of the discrimination I face by the airlines.backthepack said:
I’m 6 foot and the 3 hour flight back to school sucks ass. I always end up with the middle seat and want to fucking die.jhfstyle24 said:
Airplane experiences in general suck ass. If you're over 6 feet tall and the flight is over 3 hours it's over. Over the summer I took a 4 hour flight and couldn't walk for a day, despite being in an exit row.backthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in.
They're crammed and the in-flight experience is just awful. The only redeeming parts are the free movies and the sodas.
And forget about the fucking toilets. A normal, clean shit is bad enough on an airplane. With runs? Fuck that. And the cute stewardesses are always right there. Fuck that shit.
My carry on bag is packed to the brim so I can have enough clothes with me. It’s awful. It limits my leg room by an extra 3-4 feet.
Now it's just a nightmare. And I'm too pour to fly first class or business class to solve this issue. -
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YES!!GrundleStiltzkin said:
Dirtier than a Dubai portapotty?PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in. -
HH picture thread: things worse than speckling an airliner Lav with the runs for 30 minutesbackthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in. -
Favor de mas joob
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I don't know if hell exists, but if it does, it is back to back 9 hour flights in the rear of a plane being over 6'. On the way home was particularly excruciating managing a shitty signal through the abortion of the Oregon game and that finish. Repeatedly startled into consciousness with the sudden and urgent knowledge of hot wet dung burning at the exit.
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this is the most probable cause of inflight turbulencebackthepack said:
Sitting on one of those for 30 minutes with the runs has to be the worst experience ever.PurpleBaze said:
Yes, that part definitely sucks.backthepack said:
Not as bad but it was on an airplane.PurpleBaze said:
@jhfstyle24 ruins?backthepack said:
That’s the only thing that I remember about the Frankfurt airport. Well and the schnitzel sandwich that gave me ruins during the 14 hour flight home. Fuck that.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
No fun to go spackle the lav... I hate airplane lavs anyway. Probably the dirtiest place you'll ever want to be in. -
Dude, the two that accosted me over my desert fruit weren't even the end of the show. These hot German broads with full kit were crawling all over the airport. As you say, I have never seen anythign like it. It's rare to see one hot police chick, let alone a dozen of them in one place. Frankfurt is the best airport ever. I had a boner for 6 hours.whlinder said:The female German cops at the Frankfurt airport are fucking amazing. I’ve never seen something like that any where else.
Just got home. 26 hours from hotel to trailer. FML. I get to do it again at the end of Feb. Christ. Just shoot me. I feel for all you tall fucks. I saw a dude that had to be 6'8" slumming back in coach on the 9 hour flight to Dulles today and he looked like he would rather be getting tortured by the gooks with McCain. Fuck that. I was comfy as hell up in Polaris Business in my lay flat watching 22 miles and slamming down drinks.
