What I think I think....STD Edition
Anyway, the slate for the night was Oregon-Tree at 8PM, followed by UW-ASU until the prime time viewing spot of 1:30 AM. Thanks LarryScottFS. CLS and all the ladies just stayed upstairs and did whatever it is women do when men are in the basement watching the gayme on a 70" screen in HD. What do women do then? Talk bad about the men I assume? I never went upstairs. He had a fridge in the basement with six cases of beer in it. This guy also got catering from a barbeque joint that afternoon so we had all the pork and brisket we couId eat. I liked the food, but I hate it when people with money show off that they have money and you don't. CLS felt right at home I'm sure in this environment. Speaking of CLS, I can't remember it but she drove me home and is asleep in the other room right now. I didn't piss funny this morning so I guess we didn't fuck. I did get a text from my buddy saying I missed the toilet and pissed all over the floor of his bathroom before I left the house at 2AM, so that's nice.
- Welp, Oregon is better than I thought but still sucks and Cuog'ed it against another Pac-12 retard who thinks they are intellectually brutal. The brutal part is correct. Was fun watching the life get ripped out of thousands of Eugene white trash losers at once though.
- The Pac-12 is an abortion of a conference.
- Jake Browning played his best gayme in ages - this means he did nothing special at all, and certainly made no plays that took your breath away or made you think "There is a 4th year Senior Cobra ready to strike." He basically made no major mistakes and kept everything in front of him. A better way to describe a great Shitsox game would be nondescript. But I'll take it. Hand off to our kick ass backs and let the D play hard and don't fuck it up - that's the best we can hope for with this retarded gerbil. But good game though Jake. I still hate you and know you will rip my heart out this year.
- BBK played his best gayme in ages and seemed to be all over the field, and only about half the time was he being dragged all over the field. Good game BBK. I still hate you.
- Getting to players I don't hate, CADE MOTHERFUCKIGN OTTEN! Fuck yes! Finally a white boy I don't want to scalp. Kid played great. Hell, all the TE's played great. Maybe Bush read my thought last week where I mentioned it appeared we had shipped all of our TE's to some mystery island in the Pacific. Sample blocked well last night as well. Great game by the TE's.
- WR's weren't asked to do too much but in their limited action Fuller was great as always, Ty made a good snag or two, and Chocula had the game winning toe pick at the end. Good night.
- OL finally looked they weren't functionally retarded last night. Harris played great in all phases I thought. CENTER is where he should have always played. Much more natural for him. So, pass pro was the best it has been all year by far, which is why Jake was able to play to his nondescript ceiling, but the run blocking was suspect at times. Much of the yardage running was from misdirection and broken tackles by the terrorist and fuck her until she shits. Anyway A- for pass pro and B for run blocking. I was pretty drunk so take these scoring metrics as gospel from an alcoholic. (EDIT: Just reading other posts and saw @GreenRiverGatorz mention Harris had a bunch of fucked up snaps. I guess I recall some low snaps but was either too drunk or didn't care enough for it to register)
- RB's, not much to say. They kick ass every week. I hope all you degenerates realize how lucky we are to have gone from Polk to Sankey to Gaskin to Terrorist. Too bad all of Polk and most of Sankey were wasted on a mouth breather.
- DL was underwhelming to me. They held up in the first half, but were getting gashed a bit in the second. And my bladder was under more pressure than Wilkins all night. They get a C. I still love you Greg! Don't eat me.
- LBers had a good night led by our midget try hard warrior BBK. See above.
- DBU looked good and kept everything in front of them and held one of the best WR in the Pac-12 to almost nothing. Made me miss watching Covey get killed last week, but whatever.
- We finally have a kicker who makes FG's! NOGAF I guess but I do like feeling like lining up for 3 we will most likely get it instead of the carnival ride our FG's have been the last few years.
- Pete I still hate you but you won and winners win so good job. Bush, if the trick play works at the start you look like a genius but if it doesn't you look like a moron. Thanks moron. Other than that a pretty well called gayme I thought.
Meh. Closer than I expected, mostly because against all odds Herm seems to have his kids ready to play. @Pitchfork51 don't worry too much about it because Herm might actually end up pretty good and even if he isn't you can still take an Uber to get Taco Bell fire shits before banging out skanky real estate agents. So, we get some more Mormons to beat up on next week except these Mormons might be better than the last Mormons so hopefully Pete doesn't shit himself because it appears the AD already purchased FireCorchPete.com so FUCK!
Here's some tits on a whore who looks like she went to ASU during the glory days of the late Dennis Erickson era and was probably filming her first porn movie during last nights gayme. I love her. YMMV because you are probably gay.
Comments
-
FREE PUB!!
-
So CLS woke up a little bit ago and comes in to make coffee and shit. I decide this is the time to ask her what all the women folk were talking about upstairs all night. The answer was the kids of all the women there with kids - which was all of them except CLS. So, while guys talk about football, booze, meat and tits, and make fun of dwarfs of retards and other funny shit downstairs, I now know women talk about private horse riding lessons, their dumb kids teachers and the PTA, bake sales for band nerd kids, and other useless shit that all revolves around having kids.
I sense danger.
-
Also, anyone of you Dad's know anything about something called ninja gym? She said one Mom was talking about how much her little shits loved ninja gym...wat da fuq is that? Because if you can actually train kids to become ninjas and hire them out as a private army, I would finally see some value in having them.
-
-
BBK will be a superstar when he commits to a proper cycle. Whether that's before or after college, I see it now.
-
I did not even know this was a thing. I guess they have kids versions of this or some shit. So, it's settled then. Not used for raising an army of mini ninja warriors, but instead a modified crossfit like cult that jumps off walls and shit. So totally useless and mostly gay. Fuck.sarktastic said:http://www.ninjawarriorgyms.com/
Where moms take their kids who don’t want them to tun out like dad. -
Paging @DrFeelgoodDWAGphineas said:BBK will be a superstar when he commits to a proper cycle. Whether that's before or after college, I see it now.
-
Tell your rich fren if he wants to impress you, buy bigger toilets
-
Is @CokeGreaterThanPepsi a women?Swaye said:So CLS woke up a little bit ago and comes in to make coffee and shit. I decide this is the time to ask her what all the women folk were talking about upstairs all night. The answer was the kids of all the women there with kids - which was all of them except CLS. So, while guys talk about football, booze, meat and tits, and make fun of dwarfs of retards and other funny shit downstairs, I now know women talk about private horse riding lessons, their dumb kids teachers and the PTA, bake sales for band nerd kids, and other useless shit that all revolves around having kids.
I sense danger. -
I found this to be very amusing.Bread said:
Is @CokeGreaterThanPepsi a women?Swaye said:So CLS woke up a little bit ago and comes in to make coffee and shit. I decide this is the time to ask her what all the women folk were talking about upstairs all night. The answer was the kids of all the women there with kids - which was all of them except CLS. So, while guys talk about football, booze, meat and tits, and make fun of dwarfs of retards and other funny shit downstairs, I now know women talk about private horse riding lessons, their dumb kids teachers and the PTA, bake sales for band nerd kids, and other useless shit that all revolves around having kids.
I sense danger. -
A classic to be saved in the time capsule. Oh and tell your friend to fuck off for calling you to tell you about pissing on the floor. What's the point of that? Does he think you're going to run over and clean it up? Tell him to get the broad in there to deal with it; it's women's work.Swaye said:Watched the gayme at a buddies house who decided to throw a Pac-12 shitshow late night drink fest. Navy buddy who went to Arizona, so it was nice to have him wanting to watch ASU lose as well. He was happy because Arizona clubbed the shit out of that dumpster fire in Lake Oswego or wherever the Beavers are from. Other guys were all Big 10 grads. Big 10 grads are mostly annoying. One guy I didn't know said he went to Wisconsin. I asked him if his christian name was @PurpleBaze . He said "No, it's Scott," and looked at me funny. We didn't speak the rest of the night but mostly because he was lame and just stared at his beer all night. Wisconsin people are really fucking weird.
Anyway, the slate for the night was Oregon-Tree at 8PM, followed by UW-ASU until the prime time viewing spot of 1:30 AM. Thanks LarryScottFS. CLS and all the ladies just stayed upstairs and did whatever it is women do when men are in the basement watching the gayme on a 70" screen in HD. What do women do then? Talk bad about the men I assume? I never went upstairs. He had a fridge in the basement with six cases of beer in it. This guy also got catering from a barbeque joint that afternoon so we had all the pork and brisket we couId eat. I liked the food, but I hate it when people with money show off that they have money and you don't. CLS felt right at home I'm sure in this environment. Speaking of CLS, I can't remember it but she drove me home and is asleep in the other room right now. I didn't piss funny this morning so I guess we didn't fuck. I did get a text from my buddy saying I missed the toilet and pissed all over the floor of his bathroom before I left the house at 2AM, so that's nice.
- Welp, Oregon is better than I thought but still sucks and Cuog'ed it against another Pac-12 retard who thinks they are intellectually brutal. The brutal part is correct. Was fun watching the life get ripped out of thousands of Eugene white trash losers at once though.
- The Pac-12 is an abortion of a conference.
- Jake Browning played his best gayme in ages - this means he did nothing special at all, and certainly made no plays that took your breath away or made you think "There is a 4th year Senior Cobra ready to strike." He basically made no major mistakes and kept everything in front of him. A better way to describe a great Shitsox game would be nondescript. But I'll take it. Hand off to our kick ass backs and let the D play hard and don't fuck it up - that's the best we can hope for with this retarded gerbil. But good game though Jake. I still hate you and know you will rip my heart out this year.
- BBK played his best gayme in ages and seemed to be all over the field, and only about half the time was he being dragged all over the field. Good game BBK. I still hate you.
- Getting to players I don't hate, CADE MOTHERFUCKIGN OTTEN! Fuck yes! Finally a white boy I don't want to scalp. Kid played great. Hell, all the TE's played great. Maybe Bush read my thought last week where I mentioned it appeared we had shipped all of our TE's to some mystery island in the Pacific. Sample blocked well last night as well. Great game by the TE's.
- WR's weren't asked to do too much but in their limited action Fuller was great as always, Ty made a good snag or two, and Chocula had the game winning toe pick at the end. Good night.
- OL finally looked they weren't functionally retarded last night. Harris played great in all phases I thought. CENTER is where he should have always played. Much more natural for him. So, pass pro was the best it has been all year by far, which is why Jake was able to play to his nondescript ceiling, but the run blocking was suspect at times. Much of the yardage running was from misdirection and broken tackles by the terrorist and fuck her until she shits. Anyway A- for pass pro and B for run blocking. I was pretty drunk so take these scoring metrics as gospel from an alcoholic. (EDIT: Just reading other posts and saw @GreenRiverGatorz mention Harris had a bunch of fucked up snaps. I guess I recall some low snaps but was either too drunk or didn't care enough for it to register)
- RB's, not much to say. They kick ass every week. I hope all you degenerates realize how lucky we are to have gone from Polk to Sankey to Gaskin to Terrorist. Too bad all of Polk and most of Sankey were wasted on a mouth breather.
- DL was underwhelming to me. They held up in the first half, but were getting gashed a bit in the second. And my bladder was under more pressure than Wilkins all night. They get a C. I still love you Greg! Don't eat me.
- LBers had a good night led by our midget try hard warrior BBK. See above.
- DBU looked good and kept everything in front of them and held one of the best WR in the Pac-12 to almost nothing. Made me miss watching Covey get killed last week, but whatever.
- We finally have a kicker who makes FG's! NOGAF I guess but I do like feeling like lining up for 3 we will most likely get it instead of the carnival ride our FG's have been the last few years.
- Pete I still hate you but you won and winners win so good job. Bush, if the trick play works at the start you look like a genius but if it doesn't you look like a moron. Thanks moron. Other than that a pretty well called gayme I thought.
Meh. Closer than I expected, mostly because against all odds Herm seems to have his kids ready to play. @Pitchfork51 don't worry too much about it because Herm might actually end up pretty good and even if he isn't you can still take an Uber to get Taco Bell fire shits before banging out skanky real estate agents. So, we get some more Mormons to beat up on next week except these Mormons might be better than the last Mormons so hopefully Pete doesn't shit himself because it appears the AD already purchased FireCorchPete.com so FUCK!
Here's some tits on a whore who looks like she went to ASU during the glory days of the late Dennis Erickson era and was probably filming her first porn movie during last nights gayme. I love her. YMMV because you are probably gay.
Agree with everything, except that I think browning did make one or two passes that, while not quite take your breath away, were pretty sweet. But I agree, he is such a cock sucker that it's hard to ever give him any credit for anything. He's just one of those QBs who can win a lot on the right teamif you protect the shit out of him and he accepts his caretaker role. If he has to do anything resembling a scramble or any kind of athletic creativity,then you're fucked.
I often wonder if anybody on the team other than Gaskin likes him. Having Gaskin as your buddy on that team gives you a lot of cred and a lot of room for error; but I wonder if the real bad asses, like Jojo, Murphy, Gaines, Rapp & Co secretly want to beat his ass with pillowcases filled with bars of soap full metal jacket style. -
Your injun instincts are still intact notwithstanding that you have had to dwell your entire life in whitey world.Swaye said:So CLS woke up a little bit ago and comes in to make coffee and shit. I decide this is the time to ask her what all the women folk were talking about upstairs all night. The answer was the kids of all the women there with kids - which was all of them except CLS. So, while guys talk about football, booze, meat and tits, and make fun of dwarfs of retards and other funny shit downstairs, I now know women talk about private horse riding lessons, their dumb kids teachers and the PTA, bake sales for band nerd kids, and other useless shit that all revolves around having kids.
I sense danger.
Trust me; she did not like having to sit there and listen to all their kid shit with nothing to add. Without question, it triggered an estrogen fueled psychosis. The good news is that it will make her horny as fuck and you are in for some good nasty over the next few weeks. The bad news is that kids are a giant pain in the ass. Take it from the creeper. Although I hear being a great great great great grandfather is a blast; you'll have to ask @RaceBannon about that.
Oh, and tell your friend to fuck off. What? Does he think you're going to go run over there and clean it up? Tell him to get his broad in there to do it; that's women's work. -
This is mostly for upper-middle-class white suburban fucks who have realized early on that they did not marry good athletic genes. Really sounds like a white thing if you axe me.Swaye said:Also, anyone of you Dad's know anything about something called ninja gym? She said one Mom was talking about how much her little shits loved ninja gym...wat da fuq is that? Because if you can actually train kids to become ninjas and hire them out as a private army, I would finally see some value in having them.
-
I hear Jake is the TUFFEST Husky.
-
As painful as this is to write, he really is kind of tough. The fucking kid can take a beating. There was a thread about this last week. When he's playing like shit, and he's getting the mother loving shit beat out of uim, you'd? want him to head to the sidelines. But the fucker always gets up.89ute said:I hear Jake is the TUFFEST Husky.
-
At least you made it to the right room.Swaye said:I did get a text from my buddy saying I missed the toilet and pissed all over the floor of his bathroom before I left the house at 2AM, so that's nice.
-
Pete said in his post game kick ass presser that the trick play call was all on him … so probably not worth bashing Bush too much on that one.
-
I love you.creepycoug said:
Your injun instincts are still intact notwithstanding that you have had to dwell your entire life in whitey world.Swaye said:So CLS woke up a little bit ago and comes in to make coffee and shit. I decide this is the time to ask her what all the women folk were talking about upstairs all night. The answer was the kids of all the women there with kids - which was all of them except CLS. So, while guys talk about football, booze, meat and tits, and make fun of dwarfs of retards and other funny shit downstairs, I now know women talk about private horse riding lessons, their dumb kids teachers and the PTA, bake sales for band nerd kids, and other useless shit that all revolves around having kids.
I sense danger.
Trust me; she did not like having to sit there and listen to all their kid shit with nothing to add. Without question, it triggered an estrogen fueled psychosis. The good news is that it will make her horny as fuck and you are in for some good nasty over the next few weeks. The bad news is that kids are a giant pain in the ass. Take it from the creeper. Although I hear being a great great great great grandfather is a blast; you'll have to ask @RaceBannon about that.
Oh, and tell your friend to fuck off. What? Does he think you're going to go run over there and clean it up? Tell him to get his broad in there to do it; that's women's work. -
Yeah I called him the indestructible imbecile. His Gumby like body is actually our biggest problem. He should have been shattered countless times but just like a pants shitting version of the Terminator he never stops.creepycoug said:
As painful as this is to write, he really is kind of tough. The fucking kid can take a beating. There was a thread about this last week. When he's playing like shit, and he's getting the mother loving shit beat out of uim, you'd? want him to head to the sidelines. But the fucker always gets up.89ute said:I hear Jake is the TUFFEST Husky.
-
TYFYS I did not know that so. So Pete is the huge moron then.Tequilla said:Pete said in his post game kick ass presser that the trick play call was all on him … so probably not worth bashing Bush too much on that one.
-
Need to watch out when the Gals get together.Swaye said:So CLS woke up a little bit ago and comes in to make coffee and shit. I decide this is the time to ask her what all the women folk were talking about upstairs all night. The answer was the kids of all the women there with kids - which was all of them except CLS. So, while guys talk about football, booze, meat and tits, and make fun of dwarfs of retards and other funny shit downstairs, I now know women talk about private horse riding lessons, their dumb kids teachers and the PTA, bake sales for band nerd kids, and other useless shit that all revolves around having kids.
I sense danger. -
creepycoug said:
This is mostly for upper-middle-class white suburban fucks who have realized early on that they did not marry good athletic genes. Really sounds like a white thing if you axe me.Swaye said:Also, anyone of you Dad's know anything about something called ninja gym? She said one Mom was talking about how much her little shits loved ninja gym...wat da fuq is that? Because if you can actually train kids to become ninjas and hire them out as a private army, I would finally see some value in having them.
-
Take that Portland!minion_doog said:creepycoug said:
This is mostly for upper-middle-class white suburban fucks who have realized early on that they did not marry good athletic genes. Really sounds like a white thing if you axe me.Swaye said:Also, anyone of you Dad's know anything about something called ninja gym? She said one Mom was talking about how much her little shits loved ninja gym...wat da fuq is that? Because if you can actually train kids to become ninjas and hire them out as a private army, I would finally see some value in having them.
-
Agree on Browning. His shit the bed play tonight was just the wide open miss of I think Fuller on the left sideline... Just tossed a wounded duck 5 yards short to a guy 10 yards downfield who was wide open.
On the other hand his throw to Pounds in the endzone might have been the best I have seen from him all year. That was a fucking dot. Of course Pounds dropped it and we settled for 3 but it was still probably the best read/throw I saw him make all night.
This game was less close than the score suggests. If not for the pick, Pound's drop, and Harry's PR, we are probably looking at something like 31-6. Against a solid team, I would be very happy with that result.
However, in our normal fashion, we shit the bed just enough to make it look hard in the box score. That's both encouraging and discouraging. On one hand we know we are comfortably better than a pretty solid ASU team, and on the other hand we are still making stupid ass mistakes that turn us from a great team to merely a good one.
If those mistakes are cleaned up I expect us to beat Oregon and Stanford and WSU, maybe choke against Cal since I don't trust UW to win out. If not, we are an 8 win team. -
Through 4 gaymes I see a good to very good team that is mortally flawed with a mostly anemic pass rush, inconsistent O line, and PTSD pants shitter under CENTER.jhfstyle24 said:Agree on Browning. His shit the bed play tonight was just the wide open miss of I think Fuller on the left sideline... Just tossed a wounded duck 5 yards short to a guy 10 yards downfield who was wide open.
On the other hand his throw to Pounds in the endzone might have been the best I have seen from him all year. That was a fucking dot. Of course Pounds dropped it and we settled for 3 but it was still probably the best read/throw I saw him make all night.
This game was less close than the score suggests. If not for the pick, Pound's drop, and Harry's PR, we are probably looking at something like 31-6. Against a solid team, I would be very happy with that result.
However, in our normal fashion, we shit the bed just enough to make it look hard in the box score. That's both encouraging and discouraging. On one hand we know we are comfortably better than a pretty solid ASU team, and on the other hand we are still making stupid ass mistakes that turn us from a great team to merely a good one.
If those mistakes are cleaned up I expect us to beat Oregon and Stanford and WSU, maybe choke against Cal since I don't trust UW to win out. If not, we are an 8 win team. -
Swaye I hope you realize that you are totally screwed.
Whether you want it or not you're about to have a little pink bundle of joy in about 10 months. -
Yep. I am coming to grips with the fact that life is over. I no longer look at Jeeps as fun tools for the wilderness, but instead I judge whether or not they are big enough to kill me when I step in front of one.Pitchfork51 said:Swaye I hope you realize that you are totally screwed.
Whether you want it or not you're about to have a little pink bundle of joy in about 10 months. -
You didn't expect him to say anything else, did you?Tequilla said:Pete said in his post game kick ass presser that the trick play call was all on him … so probably not worth bashing Bush too much on that one.
-
There aren't a lot of special players on this team right now with a few exceptions … most of the guys that playing in the rotation right now are all guys that are going to be mid to late round draft choices. Those are guys that I classify as saying they are "do your job" type of players. The good thing for us is that they are really good at doing their job. The bad thing is that when you need someone to go make a play it's lacking a bit.
That being said, there's still such a material talent advantage for us that we're in great shape against anybody that we play in the PAC 12. Even a guy who is clearly going to be a big time Sunday player in N'Keal Harry is largely held in check and the only time he's able to get loose is in a situation where you'd almost least expect it.
-
Once the late 20s chicks friends start having kids it's over.Swaye said:
Yep. I am coming to grips with the fact that life is over. I no longer look at Jeeps as fun tools for the wilderness, but instead I judge whether or not they are big enough to kill me when I step in front of one.Pitchfork51 said:Swaye I hope you realize that you are totally screwed.
Whether you want it or not you're about to have a little pink bundle of joy in about 10 months.
She hates you and resents you because you don't want it, but also needs you to have one.
Interesting conundrum.
