Best Of

Pretty much a summary of the decision.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Supreme Court issued a ruling this morning that it is legal for President Donald Trump to be the president.

In a 6-3 decision, the court held that since Trump was, in fact, elected to be president, his ability to "do president things" was protected under the law.

"The court hereby rules that a president can be president," wrote Justice Amy Coney Barrett, who penned the decision for the majority. "By virtue of being president, that person is the president. I can't freaking believe I'm having to explain this."

Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson wrote a scathing dissent for the minority, arguing that she really didn't like that presidents could do stuff and also that it was very unfair how pretty Justice Barrett is for her age. "I'm really getting sick of looking at her still-youthful face," wrote Jackson. "Also, I hate laws. Laws are stupid. Case closed."

At publishing time, Justice Jackson had challenged Justice Barrett to a pay-per-view cage match.

But wait, there's more!

Apparently since they are defendants in this case, they may have to recuse themselves from all the cases they are blocking with injunctions.

I had two vaccines as a child and I didn't end up a retard like you

Follow the science

H frantically searches for bad news

Pathetic as always

You don't even understand Switzerland bro

Fuck Wal Mart. Fuck Target.

There was a time when there were local retailers selling local goods in small and medium sized towns all across this country. There was a time when Wal Mart was considered 'essential' while local businesses were unable to operate.

Cry more alligator tears over Wal Mart. Buy their fucking stock is you think they are worthy of support.

Not I. Wal Mart can go fuck themselves.