Announcement for the Bored (I hate myself so I am getting married)

theknowledge said:

Swaye said:

theknowledge said:

You are the Yin to my Yang.











You are a red man marrying a white woman about to have a pink kid.

I am a white man who married a red woman and have two pink kids.




Welcome to the club brother!

Is this the time we rub our dicks together and declare ourselves brothers? Or is that something else?

Nope. Thats it. It's in the White-Red/Red-White bylaws that I just wrote. We meet somewhere disgusting in the middle of the cuntry, say, Oklahomo City, OK or Fargay, ND. We wear tokens to represent our marriage partners. I, a cape made from a Navajo rug and you, a belt of silver spoons, nothing else. Then we do the deed. Bam! Brothers. Simple really.

theknowledge said:

I haven't posted so much on a thread in my life. You should get married every year so we can make fun at your expense annually. I can't stop laughing. One because you are so fucked but also because the degenerates on this board have really brought their A game to this party. No AIDS, just good fun and some really well thought out posts. Kudos to everyone.

1to392831weretaken said:

Alright. Well, from one retard who's already hit that figurative eject button, here's my biggest tip:

Once that baby's out, keep CLS the fuck away from Facebook and social media in general. That shit is designed in a lab to turn new mothers into competitive, overemotional monsters. Freaking squirrels have babies (and more at a time than humans at that), and yet Facebook convinces every new mother that "the miracle of birth" endows them with mythical hero status. And your alien-looking wiggling skin pile of a baby is the cutest thing on the planet and DEFINITELY already a genius because it pointed at that one thing that one time when the books say that shouldn't happen for another two weeks, but fuck Alice and her shit ugly baby that's too stupid to roll over yet.