20? Years ago coaching a Babe Ruth team at a tournament in Aberdeen, we were up against the daunting Black Hills team that we hadn’t beaten in “All-Star” tournament season in three years. On Championship Sunday, in the first game of the day, we jumped on them early and hung on for the win. An assistant for BH was a big athletic, fierce, Samoan dude with a nasty temper and the best kid on their team who refused to accept losing. Now, as you all know, I’m easy to get along with and usually avoid confrontation but this one time, I must have said something he mis-understood and didn’t like because as the game ended and the kids ran onto the field he stormed from the 3rd base coaches box into my dugout and in my face. I had a dozen Dads standing with and behind me. He didn’t care. Becoming more emboldened by the second and as he was telling me how he was going to tear my limbs off, I quickly glanced around and noticed all of the dads but one had moved well out of range. Fuck me. Just as I was thinking, “Oh Shit! I haven’t done this in 15 years but, I guess it’s go time and this ones gonna leave a mark”, Dad of my second baseman, flashed his badge and warned, you don’t want to do this, you WILL go to jail, today.
He didn’t care, set his feet, and just before he made his move, Cop-Dad pointed out 4 of Aberdeen’s uniform finest driving across the field in two cars to my dugout while the other Black Hills coaches were scrambling to defuse him.
I left with my teeth intact but without the plastic Championship Trophy.
This is an iron law.
Do NOT fight a Samoan. Either sex. It will not turn out well for you.
Especially ones named "Tiny." Trickery.
I read that as you don't want to have sex with a Samoan either - which is also generally true.
20? Years ago coaching a Babe Ruth team at a tournament in Aberdeen, we were up against the daunting Black Hills team that we hadn’t beaten in “All-Star” tournament season in three years. On Championship Sunday, in the first game of the day, we jumped on them early and hung on for the win. An assistant for BH was a big athletic, fierce, Samoan dude with a nasty temper and the best kid on their team who refused to accept losing. Now, as you all know, I’m easy to get along with and usually avoid confrontation but this one time, I must have said something he mis-understood and didn’t like because as the game ended and the kids ran onto the field he stormed from the 3rd base coaches box into my dugout and in my face. I had a dozen Dads standing with and behind me. He didn’t care. Becoming more emboldened by the second and as he was telling me how he was going to tear my limbs off, I quickly glanced around and noticed all of the dads but one had moved well out of range. Fuck me. Just as I was thinking, “Oh Shit! I haven’t done this in 15 years but, I guess it’s go time and this ones gonna leave a mark”, Dad of my second baseman, flashed his badge and warned, you don’t want to do this, you WILL go to jail, today.
He didn’t care, set his feet, and just before he made his move, Cop-Dad pointed out 4 of Aberdeen’s uniform finest driving across the field in two cars to my dugout while the other Black Hills coaches were scrambling to defuse him.
I left with my teeth intact but without the plastic Championship Trophy.
This is an iron law.
Do NOT fight a Samoan. Either sex. It will not turn out well for you.
Especially ones named "Tiny." Trickery.
I read that as you don't want to have sex with a Samoan either - which is also generally true.
ISAFNRC
Pro-tip do not cheat on a Samoan woman, her brothers will come after you
20? Years ago coaching a Babe Ruth team at a tournament in Aberdeen, we were up against the daunting Black Hills team that we hadn’t beaten in “All-Star” tournament season in three years. On Championship Sunday, in the first game of the day, we jumped on them early and hung on for the win. An assistant for BH was a big athletic, fierce, Samoan dude with a nasty temper and the best kid on their team who refused to accept losing. Now, as you all know, I’m easy to get along with and usually avoid confrontation but this one time, I must have said something he mis-understood and didn’t like because as the game ended and the kids ran onto the field he stormed from the 3rd base coaches box into my dugout and in my face. I had a dozen Dads standing with and behind me. He didn’t care. Becoming more emboldened by the second and as he was telling me how he was going to tear my limbs off, I quickly glanced around and noticed all of the dads but one had moved well out of range. Fuck me. Just as I was thinking, “Oh Shit! I haven’t done this in 15 years but, I guess it’s go time and this ones gonna leave a mark”, Dad of my second baseman, flashed his badge and warned, you don’t want to do this, you WILL go to jail, today.
He didn’t care, set his feet, and just before he made his move, Cop-Dad pointed out 4 of Aberdeen’s uniform finest driving across the field in two cars to my dugout while the other Black Hills coaches were scrambling to defuse him.
I left with my teeth intact but without the plastic Championship Trophy.
This is an iron law.
Do NOT fight a Samoan. Either sex. It will not turn out well for you.
Especially ones named "Tiny." Trickery.
I read that as you don't want to have sex with a Samoan either - which is also generally true.
ISAFNRC
Pro-tip do not cheat on a Samoan woman, her brothers will come after you
Never drink with Samoans either. Your heretofore Poly buddy will come after you.
20? Years ago coaching a Babe Ruth team at a tournament in Aberdeen, we were up against the daunting Black Hills team that we hadn’t beaten in “All-Star” tournament season in three years. On Championship Sunday, in the first game of the day, we jumped on them early and hung on for the win. An assistant for BH was a big athletic, fierce, Samoan dude with a nasty temper and the best kid on their team who refused to accept losing. Now, as you all know, I’m easy to get along with and usually avoid confrontation but this one time, I must have said something he mis-understood and didn’t like because as the game ended and the kids ran onto the field he stormed from the 3rd base coaches box into my dugout and in my face. I had a dozen Dads standing with and behind me. He didn’t care. Becoming more emboldened by the second and as he was telling me how he was going to tear my limbs off, I quickly glanced around and noticed all of the dads but one had moved well out of range. Fuck me. Just as I was thinking, “Oh Shit! I haven’t done this in 15 years but, I guess it’s go time and this ones gonna leave a mark”, Dad of my second baseman, flashed his badge and warned, you don’t want to do this, you WILL go to jail, today.
He didn’t care, set his feet, and just before he made his move, Cop-Dad pointed out 4 of Aberdeen’s uniform finest driving across the field in two cars to my dugout while the other Black Hills coaches were scrambling to defuse him.
I left with my teeth intact but without the plastic Championship Trophy.
That guy? I used to make him give me his lunch money, and I still kicked his ass down the stairs in the old WW Building.
20? Years ago coaching a Babe Ruth team at a tournament in Aberdeen, we were up against the daunting Black Hills team that we hadn’t beaten in “All-Star” tournament season in three years. On Championship Sunday, in the first game of the day, we jumped on them early and hung on for the win. An assistant for BH was a big athletic, fierce, Samoan dude with a nasty temper and the best kid on their team who refused to accept losing. Now, as you all know, I’m easy to get along with and usually avoid confrontation but this one time, I must have said something he mis-understood and didn’t like because as the game ended and the kids ran onto the field he stormed from the 3rd base coaches box into my dugout and in my face. I had a dozen Dads standing with and behind me. He didn’t care. Becoming more emboldened by the second and as he was telling me how he was going to tear my limbs off, I quickly glanced around and noticed all of the dads but one had moved well out of range. Fuck me. Just as I was thinking, “Oh Shit! I haven’t done this in 15 years but, I guess it’s go time and this ones gonna leave a mark”, Dad of my second baseman, flashed his badge and warned, you don’t want to do this, you WILL go to jail, today.
He didn’t care, set his feet, and just before he made his move, Cop-Dad pointed out 4 of Aberdeen’s uniform finest driving across the field in two cars to my dugout while the other Black Hills coaches were scrambling to defuse him.
I left with my teeth intact but without the plastic Championship Trophy.
This is an iron law.
Do NOT fight a Samoan. Either sex. It will not turn out well for you.
Especially ones named "Tiny." Trickery.
I read that as you don't want to have sex with a Samoan either - which is also generally true.
ISAFNRC
Pro-tip do not cheat on a Samoan woman, her brothers will come after you
Short story tim with Creep, who must return to his travels. I met a woman who worked in the "Temple of Justice" in O-town during my clerkship year. Samoan. Got to know her pretty well ... not like that; it was well before my Pacific Islander phase. Anyway she has like 4 brothers, they call their neighborhood a village, and she described how their Dad, with mom's full support, raised her brothers. It would all qualify as child abuse in the States. Shit was tough, and gave literal meaning to the phrase, "don't ever come home with your tail between your ass because I'll beat you worse." Brothers actually would get turned around at the door step to go out and finish a fight.
"Short story tim with Creep, who must return to his travels. I met a woman who worked in the "Temple of Justice" in O-town during my clerkship year. Samoan. Got to know her pretty well ... not like that; it was well before my Pacific Islander phase. Anyway she has like 4 brothers, they call their neighborhood a village, and she described how their Dad, with mom's full support, raised her brothers. It would all qualify as child abuse in the States. Shit was tough, and gave literal meaning to the phrase, "don't ever come home with your tail between your ass because I'll beat you worse." Brothers actually would get turned around at the door step to go out and finish a fight.
Tuff kids."
I hear you, creep.
I moved to Hawaii in the early 1980s. I always preferred the asian persuasion.
Uh, it was not reciprocated. Well, not at first. I started off in Kona which has WAY too many arrogant haoles for the taste of the "locals".
After a couple years of learning to fit in and proving myself against the local talent (brain drain is real here) I got promoted (?) to a location overrun with many Hawaiians and other large Pacific Islander types. Any haoles there were born there. Zero transplants.
My former co-workers advised me to find a Hawaiian girlfriend. So she, and her family, could protect me. I was smaller, then.
I found a couple. Two halves do make a hole. (And, yes, hapa haole more better.) Actually, the thinking was if one is good, two must be better.
No natural/predictable ending here, thank God. There were no living brothers or fathers.
I was promoted again but to a more desirable part of the islands. And eventually to another undesirable spot on another island.
Wash, rinse, repeat. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Or, so, they say.
"Short story tim with Creep, who must return to his travels. I met a woman who worked in the "Temple of Justice" in O-town during my clerkship year. Samoan. Got to know her pretty well ... not like that; it was well before my Pacific Islander phase. Anyway she has like 4 brothers, they call their neighborhood a village, and she described how their Dad, with mom's full support, raised her brothers. It would all qualify as child abuse in the States. Shit was tough, and gave literal meaning to the phrase, "don't ever come home with your tail between your ass because I'll beat you worse." Brothers actually would get turned around at the door step to go out and finish a fight.
Tuff kids."
I hear you, creep.
I moved to Hawaii in the early 1980s. I always preferred the asian persuasion.
Uh, it was not reciprocated. Well, not at first. I started off in Kona which has WAY too many arrogant haoles for the taste of the "locals".
After a couple years of learning to fit in and proving myself against the local talent (brain drain is real here) I got promoted (?) to a location overrun with many Hawaiians and other large Pacific Islander types. Any haoles there were born there. Zero transplants.
My former co-workers advised me to find a Hawaiian girlfriend. So she, and her family, could protect me. I was smaller, then.
I found a couple. Two halves do make a hole. (And, yes, hapa haole more better.) Actually, the thinking was if one is good, two must be better.
No natural/predictable ending here, thank God. There were no living brothers or fathers.
I was promoted again but to a more desirable part of the islands. And eventually to another undesirable spot on another island.
Wash, rinse, repeat. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Or, so, they say.
Good times.
I have heard that the Big Island in general has a lot more "outposts" and "real" Hawaii towns/etc. The kind of remote fishing villages that you don't just wander into running your mouth and talking shit, or you will have you shit shoved right back to where it came from. I heard Kona had that quality too back in the day, but yes, now overrun with wealthy transplants.
Even on Maui, I realized early on to just keep my mouth shut. Even if we were somewhere being ignored, or walking through a parking lot with teenagers saying shit to the fam, just keep walking.
I was there once years ago and it was one of those "Ok I'll get you McDonald's if you'll shut up" kind of days. We go in there, are completely ignored while each of the cashiers are just talking to their friends who are there just to visit. They see us waiting and almost enjoy making us stand there. Then when we order the disdain the woman had for us was clearly visible. Just keep your mouth shut, get your food, hope nobody spat on it, and move on. This was in fucking Lahaina, where you'd think they'd be quite used to mainlanders.
Too many other awesome tropical locations to travel other than Hawaii. Costa Rica blew every Hawaiian trip I’ve ever taken out of the water.
Heading out in a few weeks up an undisclosed tropical location. GTFO of the compound after a long winter.
Hawaiians are just another flavor of Americans who hate white people. Costa Ricans love white Americans, their money and their military. It’s a beautiful place.
Too many other awesome tropical locations to travel other than Hawaii. Costa Rica blew every Hawaiian trip I’ve ever taken out of the water.
Heading out in a few weeks up an undisclosed tropical location. GTFO of the compound after a long winter.
Hawaiians are just another flavor of Americans who hate white people. Costa Ricans love white Americans, their money and their military. It’s a beautiful place.
Thanks for your unbiased insight.
Especially the part about Hawaiians hating white people.
If you hadn't said that I would have gone to my grave believing that Hawaiians actually only hate racist or arrogant Caucasians.
Too many other awesome tropical locations to travel other than Hawaii. Costa Rica blew every Hawaiian trip I’ve ever taken out of the water.
Heading out in a few weeks up an undisclosed tropical location. GTFO of the compound after a long winter.
Hawaiians are just another flavor of Americans who hate white people. Costa Ricans love white Americans, their money and their military. It’s a beautiful place.
Thanks for your unbiased insight.
Especially the part about Hawaiians hating white people.
If you hadn't said that I would have gone to my grave believing that Hawaiians actually only hate racist or arrogant Caucasians.
Thanks, again.
Feel free to point me to the rent-a-girlfriend shop for protection from those loving non-racist folk.
I spent a few months on the Big Island around 1980 doing some agriculture work and getting ripped off on a land deal. We lived out in the sticks and one of the guys there had a girlfriend and he asked me to escort her to town. He was cheatin on her but the plot thickened because she was taking her love to town to a local lad. So the Samoan and his buddies come up and she is getting ready to go and I said - uh I'm like supposed to make sure you're OK.
Comments
I read that as you don't want to have sex with a Samoan either - which is also generally true.
ISAFNRC
Like @swaye firewater on steroids.
@NorthwestFresh
@MikeSeaver
@Swaye
@YellowSnow
@dflea
I guess us old Bobcats are a breed apart.
So let it be written.
@PurpleBaze
@MikeSeaver
Tuff kids.
"Short story tim with Creep, who must return to his travels. I met a woman who worked in the "Temple of Justice" in O-town during my clerkship year. Samoan. Got to know her pretty well ... not like that; it was well before my Pacific Islander phase. Anyway she has like 4 brothers, they call their neighborhood a village, and she described how their Dad, with mom's full support, raised her brothers. It would all qualify as child abuse in the States. Shit was tough, and gave literal meaning to the phrase, "don't ever come home with your tail between your ass because I'll beat you worse." Brothers actually would get turned around at the door step to go out and finish a fight.
Tuff kids."
I hear you, creep.
I moved to Hawaii in the early 1980s. I always preferred the asian persuasion.
Uh, it was not reciprocated. Well, not at first. I started off in Kona which has WAY too many arrogant haoles for the taste of the "locals".
After a couple years of learning to fit in and proving myself against the local talent (brain drain is real here) I got promoted (?) to a location overrun with many Hawaiians and other large Pacific Islander types. Any haoles there were born there. Zero transplants.
My former co-workers advised me to find a Hawaiian girlfriend. So she, and her family, could protect me. I was smaller, then.
I found a couple. Two halves do make a hole. (And, yes, hapa haole more better.) Actually, the thinking was if one is good, two must be better.
No natural/predictable ending here, thank God. There were no living brothers or fathers.
I was promoted again but to a more desirable part of the islands. And eventually to another undesirable spot on another island.
Wash, rinse, repeat. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Or, so, they say.
Good times.
Tuff kids."
I hear you, creep.
I moved to Hawaii in the early 1980s. I always preferred the asian persuasion.
Uh, it was not reciprocated. Well, not at first. I started off in Kona which has WAY too many arrogant haoles for the taste of the "locals".
After a couple years of learning to fit in and proving myself against the local talent (brain drain is real here) I got promoted (?) to a location overrun with many Hawaiians and other large Pacific Islander types. Any haoles there were born there. Zero transplants.
My former co-workers advised me to find a Hawaiian girlfriend. So she, and her family, could protect me. I was smaller, then.
I found a couple. Two halves do make a hole. (And, yes, hapa haole more better.) Actually, the thinking was if one is good, two must be better.
No natural/predictable ending here, thank God. There were no living brothers or fathers.
I was promoted again but to a more desirable part of the islands. And eventually to another undesirable spot on another island.
Wash, rinse, repeat. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Or, so, they say.
Good times.
I have heard that the Big Island in general has a lot more "outposts" and "real" Hawaii towns/etc. The kind of remote fishing villages that you don't just wander into running your mouth and talking shit, or you will have you shit shoved right back to where it came from. I heard Kona had that quality too back in the day, but yes, now overrun with wealthy transplants.
Even on Maui, I realized early on to just keep my mouth shut. Even if we were somewhere being ignored, or walking through a parking lot with teenagers saying shit to the fam, just keep walking.
I was there once years ago and it was one of those "Ok I'll get you McDonald's if you'll shut up" kind of days. We go in there, are completely ignored while each of the cashiers are just talking to their friends who are there just to visit. They see us waiting and almost enjoy making us stand there. Then when we order the disdain the woman had for us was clearly visible. Just keep your mouth shut, get your food, hope nobody spat on it, and move on. This was in fucking Lahaina, where you'd think they'd be quite used to mainlanders.
Heading out in a few weeks up an undisclosed tropical location. GTFO of the compound after a long winter.
Hawaiians are just another flavor of Americans who hate white people. Costa Ricans love white Americans, their money and their military. It’s a beautiful place.
Especially the part about Hawaiians hating white people.
If you hadn't said that I would have gone to my grave believing that Hawaiians actually only hate racist or arrogant Caucasians.
Thanks, again.
She's OK got it?!
Worked for me
Hope she had fun