If I like my nuclear family, may I keep it?

TurdBomber

LebamDawg said:

the school systems are the ones that have effed up our? normal family home.
They implemented feeding the poor kids, and the rich kids decided they could afford to pay for lunches, then the ones that brought their lunch were embarrassed about not eating what all the other kids were eating.

One of my daughters had 15 - 20 lunches hidden in a drawer and was scrounging/borrowing money to buy lunch so she wasn't embarrassed. Had to make a deal with her as she was older than the other sibs and I didn't want her screwing them up. She did work off the debt.

Then shortly after that the younger sibs were bringing home school questionnaires about home life. Did anyone smoke, drink, argue, etc.
I refused to let them fill them out.

Check out John Dewey and his philosophy on education and teaching
Here is one of many articles
https://www.iwp.edu/articles/2018/02/01/the-tragedy-of-american-education-the-role-of-john-dewey/

Dewey: What an asshole. And Rousseu. And Foucault.

Gee, why can't the French win anything, ever?

Doogles

DerekJohnson said:

RaceBannon said:

The family isn't dead. Its the number one way that Asian immigrants out perform even citizens in gaining wealth

We? are selfish - I'm guilty of that. That's why I didn't want kids. When I got some pre grown ones I golfed all weekend. I sucked but my son thinks I was great simply because I set a good example about hard work and consistent effort. He is a success.

Long live the family. Fuck the state

There is no ideal family nor are there family values. That is political sloganeering. Do the best you can. Don't have kids if you can't put them first.

Adopt a shelter dog instead

I was raised in a dysfunctional and violent household. In my mid-twenties I rented the downstairs from a Punjabi family. They took a liking to Stalin and kind of "adopted" me into their family events upstairs. Relatives in-and-out of the house all the time, a real family network. The "mom" lovingly cooking tandoori chicken for me. Etc. They kept giving me chai until I told them I couldn't stand it. Then suddenly their fridge was miraculously filled with Coke/Diet Coke.

Enough about the tandoori and chai, more about the quilcene oyster

DerekJohnson

Doogles said:

DerekJohnson said:

RaceBannon said:

The family isn't dead. Its the number one way that Asian immigrants out perform even citizens in gaining wealth

We? are selfish - I'm guilty of that. That's why I didn't want kids. When I got some pre grown ones I golfed all weekend. I sucked but my son thinks I was great simply because I set a good example about hard work and consistent effort. He is a success.

Long live the family. Fuck the state

There is no ideal family nor are there family values. That is political sloganeering. Do the best you can. Don't have kids if you can't put them first.

Adopt a shelter dog instead

I was raised in a dysfunctional and violent household. In my mid-twenties I rented the downstairs from a Punjabi family. They took a liking to Stalin and kind of "adopted" me into their family events upstairs. Relatives in-and-out of the house all the time, a real family network. The "mom" lovingly cooking tandoori chicken for me. Etc. They kept giving me chai until I told them I couldn't stand it. Then suddenly their fridge was miraculously filled with Coke/Diet Coke.

Enough about the tandoori and chai, more about the quilcene oyster

I secretly dated one daughter and then a few years later dated her half sister. I could write a book about all that.

Doog_de_Jour

Excellent article...but also chilled me to the bone with fear for what’s left of our social fabric.

One thing that’s mostly getting skipped over in all of this (though briefly touched on in the couch surfing example) is this extends way beyond just the family...the second half of the article talks about how selfish and addicted to our individual freedoms we’ve become. There’s no sense of community or “the village”.

So even if you have a supportive family (be it nuclear or extended) and loving marriage, we all still need friendships and secondary support structures (the families we “chose”).

I maintain it isn’t so much about what type of family you have, you just have to treat it like an emotional investment portfolio...keep putting as much as you can into it and *diversify*. You never know when one part of your network will break down.

So many people I know live alone, or limit their social interactions to just their significant others. Or they pour all their time into just their kids or jobs. And they’re lonely, miserable fucks for it.

I don’t know...maybe I’m glamorizing older generations, but it seemed like my parents and grandparents were more well rounded socially. They made time for family, friends, work, and social groups (Rotary, etc.). Yeah, you couldn’t do whatever you wanted whenever you wanted, but people seemed more fulfilled.

Thank you for listening to my rambling. 🙂

MikeDamone

Doog_de_Jour said:

Excellent article...but also chilled me to the bone with fear for what’s left of our social fabric.

One thing that’s mostly getting skipped over in all of this (though briefly touched on in the couch surfing example) is this extends way beyond just the family...the second half of the article talks about how selfish and addicted to our individual freedoms we’ve become. There’s no sense of community or “the village”.

So even if you have a supportive family (be it nuclear or extended) and loving marriage, we all still need friendships and secondary support structures (the families we “chose”).

I maintain it isn’t so much about what type of family you have, you just have to treat it like an emotional investment portfolio...keep putting as much as you can into it and *diversify*. You never know when one part of your network will break down.

So many people I know live alone, or limit their social interactions to just their significant others. Or they pour all their time into just their kids or jobs. And they’re lonely, miserable fucks for it.

I don’t know...maybe I’m glamorizing older generations, but it seemed like my parents and grandparents were more well rounded socially. They made time for family, friends, work, and social groups (Rotary, etc.). Yeah, you couldn’t do whatever you wanted whenever you wanted, but people seemed more fulfilled.

Thank you for listening to my rambling. 🙂

You lost me at "addicted to individual freedoms". Can you expand on that?

Sledog

All this white privilege is making me nauseous!

Imagine hard work and common sense along with normal family structure and you're right back in America! Our nation would be saved.

YellowSnow

Doog_de_Jour said:

Excellent article...but also chilled me to the bone with fear for what’s left of our social fabric.

One thing that’s mostly getting skipped over in all of this (though briefly touched on in the couch surfing example) is this extends way beyond just the family...the second half of the article talks about how selfish and addicted to our individual freedoms we’ve become. There’s no sense of community or “the village”.

So even if you have a supportive family (be it nuclear or extended) and loving marriage, we all still need friendships and secondary support structures (the families we “chose”).

I maintain it isn’t so much about what type of family you have, you just have to treat it like an emotional investment portfolio...keep putting as much as you can into it and *diversify*. You never know when one part of your network will break down.

So many people I know live alone, or limit their social interactions to just their significant others. Or they pour all their time into just their kids or jobs. And they’re lonely, miserable fucks for it.

I don’t know...maybe I’m glamorizing older generations, but it seemed like my parents and grandparents were more well rounded socially. They made time for family, friends, work, and social groups (Rotary, etc.). Yeah, you couldn’t do whatever you wanted whenever you wanted, but people seemed more fulfilled.

Thank you for listening to my rambling. 🙂

I’ve made it a point @Doog_de_Jour to turn HH e-frens into real life frens. Been successful thus far.

BearsWiin

Tug family values thread is a fucking hoot

YellowSnow

BearsWiin said:

Tug family values thread is a fucking hoot

You live the same family values as me. What’s your point?

TurdBomber

BearsWiin said:

Tug family values thread is a fucking hoot

Yours is probably non-binary AF. A complete mess of confusion and mutation.