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Tequilla Rant - Scott Ektard and Sark the Genius

TequillaTequilla Member Posts: 19,825
FUCK OFF Ektard ... you 81% POS that copies and pastes canned responses to recruiting ... which is still less of a content sin than basing your "opinions" based solely on who gives you access and information versus calling it as you see it ... never mind, that doesn't matter because you can't see shit anyway.

So Seven Win Steve gets fucking jobs because he's really fucking talented of a coach. Is that your story? Is that the story that you're peddling to idiots that still pay you $10.95 per month to be "blessed" with your fucktarded opinions? Let's go through the facts:

2009: Seven Win Steve goes 5-7 a year after the dreaded 0-12 2018 season driven by Jack Lockner's season ending injury in the 4th game of the year after losing to 3 ranked teams to start the year including the infamous ending to the BYU game that year. Ronnie Fouch was the worst QB that I've ever seen at the P12 level and the team quit on a dead man walking coach in Tyrone. The 2007 team was a 4-9 team. The 2006 team was a 5-7 team that was slightly crippled by the Stanback injury. So let's squash the myth right there ... all Seven Win Steve did in 2009 was RESTORE the program to the level that Tyrone had it ... NOTHING MORE OR NOTHING LESS. Let's not even talk about the grabbing defeat from the jaws of victory games that Sark and his coaching staff literally shit themselves on with Notre Dame (how many plays with goal to go did the offensive genius fail to draw up a play to get 1 or 2 yards), Arizona State (hail mary at the end of regulation to lose it), and blowing a 9 point 2nd half lead to UCLA and their backup QB,

2010: The offensive genius clearly got future 1st round pick Jack Lockner went 4 for 20 against Nebraska ... how about the no-show at home to Stanford losing 41-0 where fans (myself included) left the game during the 1st half because the performance was THAT fucking bad

2011: The offensive genius did such a good job of not paying attention to his defense that they got shredded and he literally fired everybody without telling them ... complete pond scum move to cover his own ass

2012: Brings a tiger to practice to prep for a 41-3 beatdown at LSU ... pisses a 17 point lead away in the Apple Cup ... gets coached circles around by Pete in Vegas ... is such a genius that people are beginning to make strong noise about firing him

2013: Starts fast and vaults to the top of the list to replace his buddy Kiffie fired on the tarmac ... for the 5th year in a row achieves his patented 3 game mid-season losing streak (talk about elite) ... runs up the score on Cal and Colorado (LOL) to secure the SC job (off the record) ... shits on himself against UCLA putting the hire on thin ice ... snatches victory from the jaws of defeat in the Apple Cup because the Cougs are the Cougs ... splits immediately afterwards for USC ... by all accounts UW made MINIMAL IF ANY effort to retain him ... very good chance that if he lost the Apple Cup there would have been serious discussions about firing him ... BUT SC BRUH ...

2014: Needs his AD to come down to the field to whine and cry to help win at Stanford ... follows that up the following week by getting beat on the road to BC (I'm assuming he thought SC was playing with house money after beating Stanford) ... gets slaughtered by charmin soft UCLA ... heat turned up on Dude Brah and his buddy Wilcox and his shit D that gave up 30+ 5 times in 13 games

2015: Fights the Fuck On before the season as pressure mounts ... loses early to Stanford ... then gets his shit pushed in against UW and goes on a bender ... DOOR.ASS.OUT

2016: Gets lucky enough to jump on as a back office guy in Saban's Bama assisting Kiffin who everybody knows is DOOR.ASS.OUT at the end of the year ... when Kiffie's finally too much of a bitch to put up any longer with after the Peach Bowl Sark gets promoted to call plays in the title game ... Saban has such a high opinion of Sark that less than 10 days after the title game Saban announced MIke Locksley as co-OC ... Sark leaves shortly thereafter to be OC under Dan Quinn in the NFL

There is NOTHING impressive in Sark's resume after leaving the nest of Petey Carroll and USC ... Sark is the definition of FLASH and SIZZLE that doesn't have the results behind it ...

If Sark was female, he'd make comments like this:

image

So if that makes you an offensive genius worthy of getting jobs Ektard, then Sark's your guy ... to me, Sark's your garden variety easy mark that flashes his charms around to distract you from what is really going on. FUCK OFF Ektard.
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Comments

  • haiehaie Member, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 21,506 Swaye's Wigwam
    If you take time to care about Fatlund Sark or Softy you should kill yourself along with Doog Lee or whatever the fuck his name is.
  • GladstoneGladstone Member Posts: 16,419
    Classics bored this shit.
  • DeepSeaZDeepSeaZ Member Posts: 3,901
    @haie if what Teq said is indeed true. Call me. I love you.
  • TequillaTequilla Member Posts: 19,825
    haie said:

    Tequilla said:

    haie said:

    If you take time to care about Fatlund Sark or Softy you should kill yourself along with Doog Lee or whatever the fuck his name is.

    You should probably go say the same to @bananasnblondes since he's the one that posted Ektard's FS comment earlier today ...

    And since you don't read my shit anyway ...

    @haie please go make yourself a cucumber anal bleach cocktail straight from the squeezed juice of the cucumber stuck straight up your shit hole ... I recommend that you pour the drink on the rocks with a little salt rim job on the top of the glass for flavor
    You were more entertaining when you were ranting about the froogs losing to baylor in a 130 point game.
    So you do read
  • GladstoneGladstone Member Posts: 16,419
    haie said:

    Tequilla said:

    haie said:

    If you take time to care about Fatlund Sark or Softy you should kill yourself along with Doog Lee or whatever the fuck his name is.

    You should probably go say the same to @bananasnblondes since he's the one that posted Ektard's FS comment earlier today ...

    And since you don't read my shit anyway ...

    @haie please go make yourself a cucumber anal bleach cocktail straight from the squeezed juice of the cucumber stuck straight up your shit hole ... I recommend that you pour the drink on the rocks with a little salt rim job on the top of the glass for flavor
    You were more entertaining when you were ranting about the froogs losing to baylor in a 130 point game.
    dis a fucking gree

    the recent bitter tequilla is my favorite iteration yet
  • Edwin_BambinoEdwin_Bambino Member Posts: 2,943
    Tequilla said:

    FUCK OFF Ektard ... you 81% POS that copies and pastes canned responses to recruiting ... which is still less of a content sin than basing your "opinions" based solely on who gives you access and information versus calling it as you see it ... never mind, that doesn't matter because you can't see shit anyway.

    So Seven Win Steve gets fucking jobs because he's really fucking talented of a coach. Is that your story? Is that the story that you're peddling to idiots that still pay you $10.95 per month to be "blessed" with your fucktarded opinions? Let's go through the facts:

    2009: Seven Win Steve goes 5-7 a year after the dreaded 0-12 2018 season driven by Jack Lockner's season ending injury in the 4th game of the year after losing to 3 ranked teams to start the year including the infamous ending to the BYU game that year. Ronnie Fouch was the worst QB that I've ever seen at the P12 level and the team quit on a dead man walking coach in Tyrone. The 2007 team was a 4-9 team. The 2006 team was a 5-7 team that was slightly crippled by the Stanback injury. So let's squash the myth right there ... all Seven Win Steve did in 2009 was RESTORE the program to the level that Tyrone had it ... NOTHING MORE OR NOTHING LESS. Let's not even talk about the grabbing defeat from the jaws of victory games that Sark and his coaching staff literally shit themselves on with Notre Dame (how many plays with goal to go did the offensive genius fail to draw up a play to get 1 or 2 yards), Arizona State (hail mary at the end of regulation to lose it), and blowing a 9 point 2nd half lead to UCLA and their backup QB,

    2010: The offensive genius clearly got future 1st round pick Jack Lockner went 4 for 20 against Nebraska ... how about the no-show at home to Stanford losing 41-0 where fans (myself included) left the game during the 1st half because the performance was THAT fucking bad

    2011: The offensive genius did such a good job of not paying attention to his defense that they got shredded and he literally fired everybody without telling them ... complete pond scum move to cover his own ass

    2012: Brings a tiger to practice to prep for a 41-3 beatdown at LSU ... pisses a 17 point lead away in the Apple Cup ... gets coached circles around by Pete in Vegas ... is such a genius that people are beginning to make strong noise about firing him

    2013: Starts fast and vaults to the top of the list to replace his buddy Kiffie fired on the tarmac ... for the 5th year in a row achieves his patented 3 game mid-season losing streak (talk about elite) ... runs up the score on Cal and Colorado (LOL) to secure the SC job (off the record) ... shits on himself against UCLA putting the hire on thin ice ... snatches victory from the jaws of defeat in the Apple Cup because the Cougs are the Cougs ... splits immediately afterwards for USC ... by all accounts UW made MINIMAL IF ANY effort to retain him ... very good chance that if he lost the Apple Cup there would have been serious discussions about firing him ... BUT SC BRUH ...

    2014: Needs his AD to come down to the field to whine and cry to help win at Stanford ... follows that up the following week by getting beat on the road to BC (I'm assuming he thought SC was playing with house money after beating Stanford) ... gets slaughtered by charmin soft UCLA ... heat turned up on Dude Brah and his buddy Wilcox and his shit D that gave up 30+ 5 times in 13 games

    2015: Fights the Fuck On before the season as pressure mounts ... loses early to Stanford ... then gets his shit pushed in against UW and goes on a bender ... DOOR.ASS.OUT

    2016: Gets lucky enough to jump on as a back office guy in Saban's Bama assisting Kiffin who everybody knows is DOOR.ASS.OUT at the end of the year ... when Kiffie's finally too much of a bitch to put up any longer with after the Peach Bowl Sark gets promoted to call plays in the title game ... Saban has such a high opinion of Sark that less than 10 days after the title game Saban announced MIke Locksley as co-OC ... Sark leaves shortly thereafter to be OC under Dan Quinn in the NFL

    There is NOTHING impressive in Sark's resume after leaving the nest of Petey Carroll and USC ... Sark is the definition of FLASH and SIZZLE that doesn't have the results behind it ...

    If Sark was female, he'd make comments like this:

    image

    So if that makes you an offensive genius worthy of getting jobs Ektard, then Sark's your guy ... to me, Sark's your garden variety easy mark that flashes his charms around to distract you from what is really going on. FUCK OFF Ektard.

    Leave Corrine out of this she runs a multi million dollar company goddamnit!
  • H_DH_D Member Posts: 6,098
    dnc said:

    Chinned for the gif, don't care nearly enough about Ektard's opinion to read all that.

    image
  • JaWarrenJaHookerJaWarrenJaHooker Member Posts: 2,030
    im suprised I actually ended up reading more than half of it. Incremental progress, Tequilla
  • TierbsHsotBoobsTierbsHsotBoobs Member Posts: 39,680
    haie said:

    Finally read this shit.

    TL,DR version:

    2009:Tequilla rooted for Sark.
    2010:Tequilla rooted for Sark.
    2011:Tequilla rooted for Sark.
    2012:Tequilla rooted for Sark.
    2013:Tequilla rooted for Sark.

    He's right, you know.

  • TierbsHsotBoobsTierbsHsotBoobs Member Posts: 39,680

    In this thread, @Tequilla takes the gloves off again and a wall of text follows.

    Also, many Doogs who hate facts support @Tequilla for being harder for Sark than anyone.
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