I have to go to New Jersey...

Alexis

Isn't there an island or something up there that the palefaces stole from your parents for shiny beads and blankets.

Sounds to me like it's a good time for a buyback.

rodmansrage

Swaye said:

rodmansrage said:

you going to like a bug catchers convention or some shit?

Sort of. Orkin's national cultural diversity awards.

My boss, the white devil, comes up to me a week ago and tells me, with great fanfare, that I have been selected as the Mid Atlantic's rep for this thing. He's all excited that one of his idiots got chosen out of like 30 other idiots for the region. Asshole probably gets a bonus or some shit. Anyway, I tell him I'm not going. He freaks out a bit and tells me he will give me the entire week off, paid, to go to this thing for two days. I'm still on the fence, so he tells me they have free booze and if you win the national award you get an all expense paid week in Vegas for you and a fuck buddy.

I finally relent. Then yesterday I find out that the Southeast Region has a mildly retarded half black half sri lankan dwarf. Godfuckingdamnit! That simple little dark oreo fucker will win this bitch going away and I will be left with my dick in my hand courtesy of another white sonofabitch. At least I get free booze.

you go from being sent home for sexual harassment training to being a trophy employee for orkin.

if that doesnt say "anyone can make it in america!" then i dont know what does.

kudos!

ps. they probably got the dwarf since he can fit into crawlspaces better than normal people, just a thought.

sarktastic

Swaye said:

rodmansrage said:

you going to like a bug catchers convention or some shit?

Sort of. Orkin's national cultural diversity awards.

My boss, the white devil, comes up to me a week ago and tells me, with great fanfare, that I have been selected as the Mid Atlantic's rep for this thing. He's all excited that one of his idiots got chosen out of like 30 other idiots for the region. Asshole probably gets a bonus or some shit. Anyway, I tell him I'm not going. He freaks out a bit and tells me he will give me the entire week off, paid, to go to this thing for two days. I'm still on the fence, so he tells me they have free booze and if you win the national award you get an all expense paid week in Vegas for you and a fuck buddy.

I finally relent. Then yesterday I find out that the Southeast Region has a mildly retarded half black half sri lankan dwarf. Godfuckingdamnit! That simple little dark oreo fucker will win this bitch going away and I will be left with my dick in my hand courtesy of another white sonofabitch. At least I get free booze.

Desperate times, desperate measures. Time to hit the Nordstrom sale for a pantsuit and pumps. As a tranny, you might still have a shot. #LBGTWINS

dflea

Call tsa and drop a dime on that fuckin' Sri Lankan bastard.

He'll never make it on the plane.

Problem solved.

Pitchfork51

If you get the opportunity to drunkenly barge into the dj booth at club Haven to tell the dj that his music sucks...don't.


Spoken from experience.


Edit: or do, we all enjoy your field stories.

2001400ex

rodmansrage said:

Swaye said:

rodmansrage said:

you going to like a bug catchers convention or some shit?

Sort of. Orkin's national cultural diversity awards.

My boss, the white devil, comes up to me a week ago and tells me, with great fanfare, that I have been selected as the Mid Atlantic's rep for this thing. He's all excited that one of his idiots got chosen out of like 30 other idiots for the region. Asshole probably gets a bonus or some shit. Anyway, I tell him I'm not going. He freaks out a bit and tells me he will give me the entire week off, paid, to go to this thing for two days. I'm still on the fence, so he tells me they have free booze and if you win the national award you get an all expense paid week in Vegas for you and a fuck buddy.

I finally relent. Then yesterday I find out that the Southeast Region has a mildly retarded half black half sri lankan dwarf. Godfuckingdamnit! That simple little dark oreo fucker will win this bitch going away and I will be left with my dick in my hand courtesy of another white sonofabitch. At least I get free booze.

you go from being sent home for sexual harassment training to being a trophy employee for orkin.

if that doesnt say "anyone can make it in america!" then i dont know what does.

kudos!

ps. they probably got the dwarf since he can fit into crawlspaces better than normal people, just a thought.

FML. I don't remember what I did this morning, but I remember the sexual harassment story.

Fuck off @Swaye

Sledog

I went to New Jersey once, it was closed.

Pitchfork51

If you are in Delaware and take a wrong turn you get to see this piece of shit sign and you know you fucked up

static.panoramio.com/photos/original/32269481.jpg

Swaye

Some good advice in this thread.

HH: Get good advice AND told to fuck off