Sub-par Head Coach Helfrich Has In Home With SPARQ #1 Athlete Kirk Merritt

AZDuck

Boy, does Helfrich suck at recruiting. (/faggy winky face, pre-emptive $75k)

http://www.oregonlive.com/recruiting/index.ssf/2015/01/kirk_merritt_nike_sparq_nation_1.html#incart_2box

HuskyJW

I used to know a coach that liked to come in 2nd or 3rd place on these guys while not focusing on the players that actually had a chance of signing.

AZDuck

Oregon has a legitimate shot at the kid.



http://247sports.com/Player/Kirk-Merritt-24026

HuskyJW

Ok (insert faggoty wink here)

Cuogar_Gold

"Kirk, just picture this scenario. You're in the national championship game, decked in white and silver with Donald Duck's gay brother's insignia on the shoulders. You're wearing a champions helmet: abstract pussy wings adorn the sides or your battle helm. You're getting prison fucked by a team from Ohio in front of 30,000 sobbing but ever-so-faithful Duck fans. I'm there on the sidelines with a puzzled look on my face as I try to pick from one of 4 of Chip's trick plays that I know won't work. You're desperately trying to contact your soon-to-be-agent about which CFL team will take you. Times goes by, your heisman qb gets destroyed, then your backup. More time goes by. Gold and white confetti falls from the rafters as you walk back to the locker room. Crying methheads scream that they still love their ducks. Just picture it, Kirk."

Mosster47

Recruit: "Coach Leach, what is a Bowl game like?"

Coach Leach: "Fuck if I know, but they sound exciting."

Cuogar_Gold

Mosster47 said:

Recruit: "Coach Leach, what is a Bowl game like?"

Coach Leach: "Fuck if I know, but they sound exciting."

Needs more Geronimo.

TierbsHsotBoobs

I'm just happy the Ducks finally learned how to pay with cash.

RoadDawg55

The recruit's name is Kirk. He's going to suck.

oregonblitzkrieg

RoadDawg55 said:

The recruit's name is Kirk. He's going to suck.

AZDuck

AnM bored is now calling Merritt to Oregon... possibly as soon as tonight

http://oregon.247sports.com/Bolt/New-Crystal-Ball-Pick-Merritt-trending-Oregon-35202332

RaccoonHarry

Mosster47 said:

Recruit: "Coach Leach, what is a Bowl game like?"

Coach Leach: "Fuck if I know, but they sound exciting."

Wait a minute! I was in one once. But then I personally lost the game with some inexplicable (for normal coaches) play calls at the end...

Mosster47

AZDuck said:

AnM bored is now calling Merritt to Oregon... possibly as soon as tonight

http://oregon.247sports.com/Bolt/New-Crystal-Ball-Pick-Merritt-trending-Oregon-35202332

So, like, signing top recruits is a good thing?

AZDuck

Kirk Merritt is going to have his announcement ceremony at a bar in his hometown of Destrehan, LA (God Bless Louisiana) at 5pm PST on Monday Feb. 2. Ducks are widely expected to be his college choice.

PurpleBaze

AZDuck said:

Kirk Merritt is going to have his announcement ceremony at a bar in his hometown of Destrehan, LA (God Bless Louisiana) at 5pm PST on Monday Feb. 2. Ducks are widely expected to be his college choice.

Ducks are a college?

AZDuck

Committed to UO, as expected...

http://oregon.247sports.com/Board/45/Contents/4-Star-APB-Kirk-Merritt-Commits-to-Oregon-35296258

greenblood

Now Oregon just needs Inside Linebacker Josh Smith to flip from Vanderbilt, and I'll be thrilled with this class.

HuskyJW

Sounds like a good pickup.

Hopefully Helfrich learned his lesson from DAT and won't run him off.

AZDuck

greenblood said:

Now Oregon just needs Inside Linebacker Josh Smith to flip from Vanderbilt, and I'll be thrilled with this class.

Not gonna happen, I'm afraid. I think we are going to settle for Jonah Moi.

greenblood

HuskyJW said:

Sounds like a good pickup.

Hopefully Helfrich learned his lesson from DAT and won't run him off.

This......

Bullets don't help if you don't know how to pull the trigger

Mosster47

This is great and all but the problem of shitty LB play wasn't really handled in this class.

Overall it's a good class but with the one glaring weakness on the roster not addressed you can't call it a great class. Special teams will be outrageous the next few years with all these young skill guys.