If you haven't seen the videos/reels/tik-toks whatever on the coach who is mic'd up when he goes out to talk to his pitchers, you must find that.
HI-FUCKING-LARIOUS.
I can't even do justice to the shit talking he does to those kids.
9 year olds might be a little young to start talking trash to them, but when I was coaching high school kids back in the day, the kids just gobbled up talking trash. They were so used to the politically correct nonsense, they actually listened when you could make them laugh or get under their skin. They live in an internet shit talking world.
I shat my pants playing tee ball. It was almost the end of the game, so I toughed it out. When I got in the truck afterward my dad goes "did you shit your pants?" That was Chuck family language for "did you fart?". I looked at him dead serious and said yes. He was like "wait...what? Really?". I said yes and he just laughed. He would've laughed all the way home but it stunk pretty bad.
Freshman year playing JV hoops I hurt my knee and missed a week or so while the swelling went down. First game back I made a ridiculous turnover giving them a breakaway. I chased the guy down, and while attempting to go up behind him and block his layup I tripped over myself, hurt my knee again, and went down in a heap. He made the layup, got the and one for the foul, and I stayed on the floor in pain but more embarrassed than anything. Dark times. It's the only time I ever remember crying from getting hurt as that was frowned upon in my family. Sat the rest of the game in the locker room blubbering like a baby and wondering wtf was wrong with my knee. Turned out to be a torn ACL and big meniscus tear.
I remember when @DoubleJDawg first joined the site. He posted something innocuous and I responded with "DoubleJ you lying fuck." And he PM'd me totally confused and insisting he was telling the truth. I went on to explain the etymology of it all.
We were down by 1 to North Thurston in the playoffs on their 25 with no timeouts and like 10 seconds left and our quarterback spiked the ball *backwards* which is technically a fumble and ran out the clock.
This reminded me of when I was 9, I drilled my best friend. He was crying, his mom came out of the bleachers. After about a 5 minute stoppage, he stole 2nd, laughing at me. That was it for me. From then on, no quarter, no mercy…
7th or 8th grade playing soccer. An opposing player and I end up on the ground, tangled up. I’m still trying to get the ball and probably kicked him. He then stomped me in the nuts. I screamed like a little bitch and was on the sideline crying for 10 minutes.
Junior year, State wrestling tourney. Beating the defending state champ 6-5. Go out of bounds with 7 seconds left. I’m on top. Only have to ride him for 7 fucking seconds and I place.
I knew he was going to stand up outside leg. I knew I could slap an outside cradle on him. If I wasn’t retarded all I had to do was pancake down and hold on. But alas, I am retarded. Got so excited I tried to turn him. He was able to slip out with 1 second left and got the reversal.
I never got the glory, and have pretty much sucked at life ever since.
BRB. Going to hang myself now. Thanks for reminding me.
Comments
If you haven't seen the videos/reels/tik-toks whatever on the coach who is mic'd up when he goes out to talk to his pitchers, you must find that.
HI-FUCKING-LARIOUS.
I can't even do justice to the shit talking he does to those kids.
9 year olds might be a little young to start talking trash to them, but when I was coaching high school kids back in the day, the kids just gobbled up talking trash. They were so used to the politically correct nonsense, they actually listened when you could make them laugh or get under their skin. They live in an internet shit talking world.
I shat my pants playing tee ball. It was almost the end of the game, so I toughed it out. When I got in the truck afterward my dad goes "did you shit your pants?" That was Chuck family language for "did you fart?". I looked at him dead serious and said yes. He was like "wait...what? Really?". I said yes and he just laughed. He would've laughed all the way home but it stunk pretty bad.
Freshman year playing JV hoops I hurt my knee and missed a week or so while the swelling went down. First game back I made a ridiculous turnover giving them a breakaway. I chased the guy down, and while attempting to go up behind him and block his layup I tripped over myself, hurt my knee again, and went down in a heap. He made the layup, got the and one for the foul, and I stayed on the floor in pain but more embarrassed than anything. Dark times. It's the only time I ever remember crying from getting hurt as that was frowned upon in my family. Sat the rest of the game in the locker room blubbering like a baby and wondering wtf was wrong with my knee. Turned out to be a torn ACL and big meniscus tear.
I remember when @DoubleJDawg first joined the site. He posted something innocuous and I responded with "DoubleJ you lying fuck." And he PM'd me totally confused and insisting he was telling the truth. I went on to explain the etymology of it all.
We were trailing by three and it was second and goal. 4 yard line. I thought - why not try the out pass? - they will never expect it
We were down by 1 to North Thurston in the playoffs on their 25 with no timeouts and like 10 seconds left and our quarterback spiked the ball *backwards* which is technically a fumble and ran out the clock.
This reminded me of when I was 9, I drilled my best friend. He was crying, his mom came out of the bleachers. After about a 5 minute stoppage, he stole 2nd, laughing at me. That was it for me. From then on, no quarter, no mercy…
You invented Oregon football? Hi Damon!!1!
Hey, I'm one of those snooty fags from Mark Morris! Just not one of the golf fags. 😉 ⇐ $75k
There were really just two in particular I hated. A couple grade A Longview Country Club dickheads.
I lost my first varsity wrestling match 12-0. Dude knew everything I was going to do before I even did it. Hyun Um beat me like a rented mule.
7th or 8th grade playing soccer. An opposing player and I end up on the ground, tangled up. I’m still trying to get the ball and probably kicked him. He then stomped me in the nuts. I screamed like a little bitch and was on the sideline crying for 10 minutes.
Junior year, State wrestling tourney. Beating the defending state champ 6-5. Go out of bounds with 7 seconds left. I’m on top. Only have to ride him for 7 fucking seconds and I place.
I knew he was going to stand up outside leg. I knew I could slap an outside cradle on him. If I wasn’t retarded all I had to do was pancake down and hold on. But alas, I am retarded. Got so excited I tried to turn him. He was able to slip out with 1 second left and got the reversal.
I never got the glory, and have pretty much sucked at life ever since.
BRB. Going to hang myself now. Thanks for reminding me.
Does Damon Huard post here?
Brb. Jo.