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Chief Swaye fall down drinking big heapum firewater!
Swaye
Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,497 
UPS guy rolls up to the teepee for the second night in a row. Thinking I am under attack I start torching off rounds from the trailer and he just throws the package off the truck and into my yard. VICTORY!
I do a low crawl through the front yard to reach the box, and tactical roll back to the trailer. Get the package inside and realize the return address says:
Dirka Dirka Baze
co: BOOM
Sultan of Kirkland, WA
55555-8181
Figure since the Covid didn't get me the explosion won't either. Open it wearing oven mitts just to be safe.
Turns out that crafty brown terrorist hooked me up. Who says ISIS can't be fun?
Thanks Bazey. I always tell everyone you are the best terrorist I know. Super pumped about the coconut rum and the Hawaiian cigars! I figure I can use the Apple Liqueur to get Mrs. Swaye drunk so I can get some ass. Rye Whiskey will be great for swilling and interested to try a rum from Snohomish. Who knew? It's like Christmas in April, but with no snow and plenty of quarantine.
Now, I must ask that all the men from HH stop sending me care packages because I am pretty sure Mrs. Swaye already had concerns about my past as a queer man, and this is really reinforcing some of those fears. I told her not to worry. If I go gay again she can be my fag hag. lulz
@PurpleBaze
I do a low crawl through the front yard to reach the box, and tactical roll back to the trailer. Get the package inside and realize the return address says:
Dirka Dirka Baze
co: BOOM
Sultan of Kirkland, WA
55555-8181
Figure since the Covid didn't get me the explosion won't either. Open it wearing oven mitts just to be safe.
Turns out that crafty brown terrorist hooked me up. Who says ISIS can't be fun?
Thanks Bazey. I always tell everyone you are the best terrorist I know. Super pumped about the coconut rum and the Hawaiian cigars! I figure I can use the Apple Liqueur to get Mrs. Swaye drunk so I can get some ass. Rye Whiskey will be great for swilling and interested to try a rum from Snohomish. Who knew? It's like Christmas in April, but with no snow and plenty of quarantine.
Now, I must ask that all the men from HH stop sending me care packages because I am pretty sure Mrs. Swaye already had concerns about my past as a queer man, and this is really reinforcing some of those fears. I told her not to worry. If I go gay again she can be my fag hag. lulz
@PurpleBaze
Comments
Enjoy the alcohol and tobacco. The firearm will arrive some time in the near future.
Thank you my friend. Really appreciate both you and @UW_Doog_Bot (and @DerekJohnson and @CFetters_Nacho_Lover last year).
What could go wrong?
lol
Alcohol, tobacco, firearms, and wrist bling. I've got you covered.
*disclaimer: Only provided it is nearby a paying Uber rider route