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Bye Bye Purple Program Of Mine (From the archives - too long, don't read)
dnc
Member Posts: 56,652
Trying to free up some space on the hard drive and I came across this parody I poasted on Dawgman the day it was announced Ty was getting his fourth year.
It actually feels like the program might potentially be alive for the first time since that day. We'll see. Tequila will probably be the only one who reads this, so enjoy Teq. Or fuck off.
A long, long time ago... I can still remember
How that pigskin used to make me smile.
And I knew if Mora had his chance
That he could make those people dance
And, surely, they’d be happy for a while.
But December 07 made me shiver
With every paper I’d deliver.
Bad news on the doorstep;
We headed backwards one more step.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read that we were keeping Ty
But something touched me deep inside
The day the program died.
So bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin', "this’ll be the day that I die.
"this’ll be the day that I die."
Did you write the book of love,
And do you have faith in Jake above,
If the Bible tells you so?
Do you believe in purple ’n gold,
Can Locker save your mortal soul,
And can you teach Ty how to coach?
Well, we all know Baer can't coach
cause Ducks and Coogs can’t wait to play him
They both kicked our asses
Tim missed his sideline passes
I was a lonely teenage barkin’ Dawg
With a purple W on my pickup truck,
But I knew that I was out of luck
The day the program died.
I started singin’, "bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
"this’ll be the day that I die."
Now for five years we’ve been on our own
And moss grows fat on our old gravestone,
But that’s not how it used to be.
Then the midgets played for the manboobs king,
And then the fraud was hired to make our program clean
Despite the cries from the Irish fiends
Oh, and while Tawd was a blogging clown,
The Tyster made our fanbase frown
The treadmills were upgraded
We all feel fucking jaded
The Top Dawg wants us to look like the Ducks,
Ty needs more bullets and a little luck
We can only sing dirges in the dark
The day the program died.
We were singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
Chocolatey milk in a summer practice.
How did our players ever live without this?
One and eight against our northwest rivals.
We lost to fowl on the grass.
And couldn’t even stop a noodle arm pass,
Even the Beavs had no trouble beating this cast.
Now the half-time air was sweet perfume
Eight four and one when that whistle blew!
We all got up to dance,
Oh, but we never got the chance!
'cause the opponent came out to take the field;
With two quarters left before they’d yield.
Do you recall what was revealed
The day the program died?
We started singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
Oh, and there we were all in one place,
A generation in disgrace
With no time left to start again.
So come on: Jake be nimble, Jake be quick!
The Savior’s neck took a wicked hit
Cause pain is the devil’s only friend.
Oh, and as I watched Todd on the stage
My hands were clenched in fists of rage.
No AD born in hell
Could top that Vandy spell.
And as the flames climbed high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite,
I saw Tawdy laughing with delight
The day the program died
He was singing, "bye-bye, purple program of thine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of them cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
I met a Hugh who sang the blues
And I asked him for some happy news,
But he just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the sacred field
Where I’d seen the pigskin years before,
But the man there said the pigskin wouldn’t play.
And in the streets: the boosters screamed,
The Tyees cried, and the rivals dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
The famed touchdown siren was broken.
And the three men that I hate the most:
The Top Dawg, Ty, and ole Emmert’s ghost,
They set a tee time for the course
The day the program died.
And they were singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of thine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of them cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
They were singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of thine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of them cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
It actually feels like the program might potentially be alive for the first time since that day. We'll see. Tequila will probably be the only one who reads this, so enjoy Teq. Or fuck off.
A long, long time ago... I can still remember
How that pigskin used to make me smile.
And I knew if Mora had his chance
That he could make those people dance
And, surely, they’d be happy for a while.
But December 07 made me shiver
With every paper I’d deliver.
Bad news on the doorstep;
We headed backwards one more step.
I can’t remember if I cried
When I read that we were keeping Ty
But something touched me deep inside
The day the program died.
So bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin', "this’ll be the day that I die.
"this’ll be the day that I die."
Did you write the book of love,
And do you have faith in Jake above,
If the Bible tells you so?
Do you believe in purple ’n gold,
Can Locker save your mortal soul,
And can you teach Ty how to coach?
Well, we all know Baer can't coach
cause Ducks and Coogs can’t wait to play him
They both kicked our asses
Tim missed his sideline passes
I was a lonely teenage barkin’ Dawg
With a purple W on my pickup truck,
But I knew that I was out of luck
The day the program died.
I started singin’, "bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
"this’ll be the day that I die."
Now for five years we’ve been on our own
And moss grows fat on our old gravestone,
But that’s not how it used to be.
Then the midgets played for the manboobs king,
And then the fraud was hired to make our program clean
Despite the cries from the Irish fiends
Oh, and while Tawd was a blogging clown,
The Tyster made our fanbase frown
The treadmills were upgraded
We all feel fucking jaded
The Top Dawg wants us to look like the Ducks,
Ty needs more bullets and a little luck
We can only sing dirges in the dark
The day the program died.
We were singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
Chocolatey milk in a summer practice.
How did our players ever live without this?
One and eight against our northwest rivals.
We lost to fowl on the grass.
And couldn’t even stop a noodle arm pass,
Even the Beavs had no trouble beating this cast.
Now the half-time air was sweet perfume
Eight four and one when that whistle blew!
We all got up to dance,
Oh, but we never got the chance!
'cause the opponent came out to take the field;
With two quarters left before they’d yield.
Do you recall what was revealed
The day the program died?
We started singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of mine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of us cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
Oh, and there we were all in one place,
A generation in disgrace
With no time left to start again.
So come on: Jake be nimble, Jake be quick!
The Savior’s neck took a wicked hit
Cause pain is the devil’s only friend.
Oh, and as I watched Todd on the stage
My hands were clenched in fists of rage.
No AD born in hell
Could top that Vandy spell.
And as the flames climbed high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite,
I saw Tawdy laughing with delight
The day the program died
He was singing, "bye-bye, purple program of thine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of them cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
I met a Hugh who sang the blues
And I asked him for some happy news,
But he just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the sacred field
Where I’d seen the pigskin years before,
But the man there said the pigskin wouldn’t play.
And in the streets: the boosters screamed,
The Tyees cried, and the rivals dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
The famed touchdown siren was broken.
And the three men that I hate the most:
The Top Dawg, Ty, and ole Emmert’s ghost,
They set a tee time for the course
The day the program died.
And they were singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of thine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of them cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
They were singing,
"bye-bye, purple program of thine.
Drove DawgDaysNight to celebrate,
But the rest of them cried.
And Lloyd St Claire was drinking Zima and wine
Singin’, "this’ll be the day that I die.
this’ll be the day that I die."
Comments
It was the day montlake pigskin cried.
DDN was one of my first blocked users at doogman, he was that bad.
Although, The Man In Black did come back and apologize for supporting Ty and admitted it was all about race not performance.
Good times.
We won.
He was as bad, if not worse, than DDN when it came to supporting Ty.
Hopefully he's been sentenced to a life of 1000 daily splintered plunger rapes.
SWIDT?
We haven't won fuck' all
linePie for the first time. American Pie helped put our hatred of Vietnam in perspective when I was but 30 years old and eventually end the military draft, whereas Ty's fourth year and 0-12 which faded from memory as soon as it happened actually began the process that five years later gave us a new football stadium and just last week brought Husky Football its first real head coach since resignation acknowledged the Dawgfather's status as the most disparaged man on campus west of Montlake Blvd. I was wrong in believing there would always be a military draft to waste the time and lives of men too young to know better,.... and I can still be wrong about the hopelessness of a return to Husky Football glory.