Clay Helton and USC Pessimism
Comments
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"It was the girlfriend's fault" is one of my favorite genres of fan commentary and rumor. This variation is especially great: the sourceless "I heard," the contradictory social media showing they're still together and she's in Seattle doing an internship this summer. Or maybe she's in Seattle to flaunt her relationship with a new guy, I dunno.HorrifyinglyAlluring said:I heard Browning's GF dumped him the week of the SC game and he was emotionally in the tank. LOL. Also said GF was a fucking Oregon student. Could Browning be any more unlikable?
All that being said, Jake Browning must have sucked against USC, Alabama, ASU, and Penn State because a girl was mean to him before those games, not because he isn't a Heisman Trophy candidate. He is. I mean, if Giselle didn't let Tom Brady eat booty before every game, he'd have only like three rings. It's science. -
FTFYCuntWaffle said:The USC loss in 2016 was a shitty loss. Sam Darnold was throwing footballs into pringles cans that night. Jake Browning shit his pants (nothing new but still) and our offensive gameplan was to avoid letting Gaskin or Coleman touch the ball.
It was a total disaster. Helton fucking blows. USC should have clown shoed the conference last year with who they had and it took A David Shaw shitty 4th down call to squeak by the championship. -
Hurtful.Squirt said:
"It was the girlfriend's fault" is one of my favorite genres of fan commentary and rumor. This variation is especially great: the sourceless "I heard," the contradictory social media showing they're still together and she's in Seattle doing an internship this summer. Or maybe she's in Seattle to flaunt her relationship with a new guy, I dunno.HorrifyinglyAlluring said:I heard Browning's GF dumped him the week of the SC game and he was emotionally in the tank. LOL. Also said GF was a fucking Oregon student. Could Browning be any more unlikable?
All that being said, Jake Browning must have sucked against USC, Alabama, ASU, and Penn State because a girl was mean to him before those games, not because he isn't a Heisman Trophy candidate. He is. I mean, if Giselle didn't let Tom Brady eat booty before every game, he'd have only like three rings. It's science. -
yeah there's nothing bragworthy about having usc friends.
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I respect you so much. We talk about you all the time, even though we’ve never met. You rowboating son of a bitch!YellowSnow said:
I have some frens that went to USC for grad school. They really respeck me a lot.creepycoug said:
I don't have any USC frens. I'm jealous af.Gladstone said:i have many usc friends and they have been done with helton once he started max 'i ruined my life by going to usc' browne over darnold, effectively forfeiting 2016 season before it began
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Jake browning is so pathetic that he's the only d1 college quarterback that I feel confident saying I get more pussy than.
Except Rudy carpenter. Fuck that faggot. -
Poor Rudy. I remember Kirk Herbstreet doing an interview with Miami's QB back in the early 2000's when they we good and the dude's girlfriend was at his house and she wasn't even doable. You're winning national titles in Miami at QB and banging a bridge troll. That dude has a looooooong life ahead of him.Pitchfork51 said:Jake browning is so pathetic that he's the only d1 college quarterback that I feel confident saying I get more pussy than.
Except Rudy carpenter. Fuck that faggot. -
I pregame pretty hard that day with @HuskyJW after @Gladstone gave me a fake number.YellowSnow said:
It was one of the worst night's of my life after having a total kick ass day of back stage Game Day passes and bitching kegger at the Row Boat House.Swaye said:
This.CuntWaffle said:The USC loss in 2016 was a shitty loss. Sam Darnold was throwing footballs into pringles cans that night. Jake Browning shit his pants (nothing new but still) and our offensive gameplan was to avoid letting Gaskin touch the ball.
It was a total disaster. Helton fucking blows. USC should have clown shoed the conference last year with who they had and it took A David Shaw shitty 4th down call to squeak by the championship.
Unsurprisingly, I should have known that was going to be the highlight. -
Ken Dorsey?Mosster47 said:
Poor Rudy. I remember Kirk Herbstreet doing an interview with Miami's QB back in the early 2000's when they we good and the dude's girlfriend was at his house and she wasn't even doable. You're winning national titles in Miami at QB and banging a bridge troll. That dude has a looooooong life ahead of him.Pitchfork51 said:Jake browning is so pathetic that he's the only d1 college quarterback that I feel confident saying I get more pussy than.
Except Rudy carpenter. Fuck that faggot. -
That's the one.creepycoug said:
Ken Dorsey?Mosster47 said:
Poor Rudy. I remember Kirk Herbstreet doing an interview with Miami's QB back in the early 2000's when they we good and the dude's girlfriend was at his house and she wasn't even doable. You're winning national titles in Miami at QB and banging a bridge troll. That dude has a looooooong life ahead of him.Pitchfork51 said:Jake browning is so pathetic that he's the only d1 college quarterback that I feel confident saying I get more pussy than.
Except Rudy carpenter. Fuck that faggot.
