Promoting the TE coach to OC, especially after the OC and OL coaches unexpectedly bail after less than a month, seems more like something UCLA would do rather than BAMA.
Morale in the building must be a complete disaster.
Deboer walks down the red-carpeted hallways, adorned with trophies, glittering rings, and portraits of a Saban reminiscent of Mao on both sides. The only sound is a faint laughter and the clinking of glasses emanating from the largest office, Saban's office, at the end of the hall. "It's nothing," Deboer thinks to himself as he scans his key to enter his own office. Just as the door unlocks, Saban's office door swings open. Two overweight boosters in garish red, one with a cigar in his mouth, are patting Saban on the back and laughing while shaking their heads. The sweatier of the two glances up and sees Deboer halfway into his office, immediately falling silent. Awkward eye contact is made as Saban and the other booster cease laughing. Saban gives a half-hearted smile and a mild "Hey, Kevin, sorry to disturb you" as he pulls the boosters back into the room, shutting the door behind them, and their laughter erupts even louder than before.
Deboer enters his modest office, thinking, "They are probably just old friends, and senile boomers are screwing up things worse than my name lately anyway," as he moves to sit in the worn red chair he asked to be replaced weeks ago. Deboer wonders what his good college friend of 20+ years, Chuck Morell, has planned. Maybe he could get him as an assistant or consultant for the DC job? If only Chuck would return his phone calls. "Oh, well, lots of work to do. Let's get ready for the offensive coaches meeting in 15 minutes." Deboer buzzes in Beth-Annie, the plump blonde intern with a rural southern drawl who answers phones and emails, asking her to make him a coffee and if she has any messages from this morning. Her animal print pants are too tight, but for some strange reason, that doesn't bother Deboer. She drops a note on his desk saying some bald guy came by earlier and leaves. The note is from his other friend of 20+ years.
"Hey, buddy, to be honest, I was only following you because I wanted to be a high-paid OC at a major program, you know the job I already had, but you took a situation where we were all going to be worshipped and paid top 5 money at a top 20 program coming off of a national championship appearance and slit our best friend's throat to do it. We both know you would have done the same to me next when things didn't go perfectly here. It's been fun, but there was a reason why I turned down the Alabama job last year. I'm going back to Seattle to take the Seahawks job. Good luck.
P.S. Huff is coming with me too, its just business, no hard feelings"
As Deboer finishes reading, Sheridan steps into his office with a grad assistant and a ball boy, "Well, I guess it's just us today," Sheridan says chuckling. Deboer replies, "Wait, where is Shep?" "Oh yeah, he texted me that he is going to be out for a couple of days, personal reasons," Sheridan responds.
Comments
Thanks Taft!
My eyes may deceive me but I don't see Shep on this list of Alabama OCs.
Promoting the TE coach to OC, especially after the OC and OL coaches unexpectedly bail after less than a month, seems more like something UCLA would do rather than BAMA.
Morale in the building must be a complete disaster.
Deboer walks down the red-carpeted hallways, adorned with trophies, glittering rings, and portraits of a Saban reminiscent of Mao on both sides. The only sound is a faint laughter and the clinking of glasses emanating from the largest office, Saban's office, at the end of the hall. "It's nothing," Deboer thinks to himself as he scans his key to enter his own office. Just as the door unlocks, Saban's office door swings open. Two overweight boosters in garish red, one with a cigar in his mouth, are patting Saban on the back and laughing while shaking their heads. The sweatier of the two glances up and sees Deboer halfway into his office, immediately falling silent. Awkward eye contact is made as Saban and the other booster cease laughing. Saban gives a half-hearted smile and a mild "Hey, Kevin, sorry to disturb you" as he pulls the boosters back into the room, shutting the door behind them, and their laughter erupts even louder than before.
Deboer enters his modest office, thinking, "They are probably just old friends, and senile boomers are screwing up things worse than my name lately anyway," as he moves to sit in the worn red chair he asked to be replaced weeks ago. Deboer wonders what his good college friend of 20+ years, Chuck Morell, has planned. Maybe he could get him as an assistant or consultant for the DC job? If only Chuck would return his phone calls. "Oh, well, lots of work to do. Let's get ready for the offensive coaches meeting in 15 minutes." Deboer buzzes in Beth-Annie, the plump blonde intern with a rural southern drawl who answers phones and emails, asking her to make him a coffee and if she has any messages from this morning. Her animal print pants are too tight, but for some strange reason, that doesn't bother Deboer. She drops a note on his desk saying some bald guy came by earlier and leaves. The note is from his other friend of 20+ years.
"Hey, buddy, to be honest, I was only following you because I wanted to be a high-paid OC at a major program, you know the job I already had, but you took a situation where we were all going to be worshipped and paid top 5 money at a top 20 program coming off of a national championship appearance and slit our best friend's throat to do it. We both know you would have done the same to me next when things didn't go perfectly here. It's been fun, but there was a reason why I turned down the Alabama job last year. I'm going back to Seattle to take the Seahawks job. Good luck.
P.S. Huff is coming with me too, its just business, no hard feelings"
As Deboer finishes reading, Sheridan steps into his office with a grad assistant and a ball boy, "Well, I guess it's just us today," Sheridan says chuckling. Deboer replies, "Wait, where is Shep?" "Oh yeah, he texted me that he is going to be out for a couple of days, personal reasons," Sheridan responds.
Kevin lol
Perfect