In Bama's Prison Rape of USC, the only thing missing was Sark
In Bama's Prison Rape of USC, the only thing missing was Sark
Alabama's crushing victory over USC lacked only Steve Sarkisian's all-too-familiar deer-in-the-headlights look.
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Probably not a good look for the site to mention prison rape in a front page article, el oh fucking el
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shoots, brah 2.0
Like Sark is gonna stay off the booze and gals hangin with recently divorced Joey Freshwater
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Saban is going to take Sark and use him on his staff just like Pete Carroll did. Gonna coach the coaches. Turn him back into a winner. And if Sark fucks up, Saban will kick his ass out. No questions asked. Nothing to lose and everything to gain. He did it with Lane Kiffin, and Sark could be next.DerekJohnson said:
Saban is one savvy motherfucker, isn't he?
Credit to @RaceBannon on this theory. GREAT JOB RACE!!!!!1 -
Clay Travis is the source, so I call bullshit.PurpleJ said:
https://mobile.twitter.com/ClayTravis/status/772253679118389249
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Either way it will be interesting. The USC scout board thought it was.TierbsHsotBoobs said:
Clay Travis is the source, so I call bullshit.PurpleJ said:
https://mobile.twitter.com/ClayTravis/status/772253679118389249
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There's literally no upside for Saban in hiring Sark if you assume that he can mold coaches to suit his methodology.
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If it's true, it's probably Saban doing this as a favor to Kiffen, nothing more. Sark will probably have no direct impact on the offense, but Kiffen and he will be able to talk late every night about bubble screens and/or bubble butts.
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Sober Sark is a good QB coach, possibly an OC with some adjustments. Kiffin struggled at first until Saban fixed his shit up. Now all of a sudden, he's a better playcaller. They set up USC real good today, starting conservative and sucking them up to the LOS before killing them deep. Having talent helps, and they were both pretty successful under Carroll at USC. That's how they got head coaching gigs to begin with, right?doogsinparadise said:There's literally no upside for Saban in hiring Sark if you assume that he can mold coaches to suit his methodology.
Either way, if Sark fucks up or won't play along with Saban, he should know that Saban can probably end his career. He basically has to go back to being a REAL head coach's bitch for a while. I'm sure Saban will make that fact evident behind closed doors.
If true...
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Tosh graduated from intern to a real position coach gig this year, btw. The Tide Rolls On...
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Or Saban knows that Sark actually has something to offer as an assistant and he has nothing to lose, because he holds all the cards. He doesn't need to do favors for Lane. What would his motivation even be? Keeping him? He just let his DC go get a head coach job, so I doubt he intends on holding on to Lane. He wants him to graduate and maybe he thinks he can turn Sark into his replacement. Maybe not.DerekJohnson said:If it's true, it's probably Saban doing this as a favor to Kiffen, nothing more. Sark will probably have no direct impact on the offense, but Kiffen and he will be able to talk late every night about bubble screens and/or bubble butts.
Sark isn't as big a dumbass as he gets made out to be. Not head coach material, sure, but he can actually be a decent assistant. Super Bowl champion Pete Carroll seems to agree, and people forget that Charlie Weiss was an abject failure as a HC but a bona fide success under Belichick.
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Would you hire him as your OC?PurpleJ said:
Or Saban knows that Sark actually has something to offer as an assistant and he has nothing to lose, because he holds all the cards. He doesn't need to do favors for Lane. What would his motivation even be? Keeping him? He just let his DC go get a head coach job, so I doubt he intends on holding on to Lane. He wants him to graduate and maybe he thinks he can turn Sark into his replacement. Maybe not.DerekJohnson said:If it's true, it's probably Saban doing this as a favor to Kiffen, nothing more. Sark will probably have no direct impact on the offense, but Kiffen and he will be able to talk late every night about bubble screens and/or bubble butts.
Sark isn't as big a dumbass as he gets made out to be. Not head coach material, sure, but he can actually be a decent assistant. Super Bowl champion Pete Carroll seems to agree, and people forget that Charlie Weiss was an abject failure as a HC but a bona fide success under Belichick.
That's what I thought. -
Sure...PurpleJ said:
Sober Sark is a good QB coach, possibly an OC with some adjustments. Kiffin struggled at first until Saban fixed his shit up. Now all of a sudden, he's a better playcaller. They set up USC real good today, starting conservative and sucking them up to the LOS before killing them deep. Having talent helps, and they were both pretty successful under Carroll at USC. That's how they got head coaching gigs to begin with, right?doogsinparadise said:There's literally no upside for Saban in hiring Sark if you assume that he can mold coaches to suit his methodology.
Either way, if Sark fucks up or won't play along with Saban, he should know that Saban can probably end his career. He basically has to go back to being a REAL head coach's bitch for a while. I'm sure Saban will make that fact evident behind closed doors.
If true...
After his record of incompetence at UW I'm not inclined to give Sark that much credit for his work under Pete at SC. He had Leinart, Bush, Williams, etc. of course they were going to set offensive records. -
He isn't being hired as an OC and I'm not Nick Saban.DerekJohnson said:
Would you hire him as your OC?PurpleJ said:
Or Saban knows that Sark actually has something to offer as an assistant and he has nothing to lose, because he holds all the cards. He doesn't need to do favors for Lane. What would his motivation even be? Keeping him? He just let his DC go get a head coach job, so I doubt he intends on holding on to Lane. He wants him to graduate and maybe he thinks he can turn Sark into his replacement. Maybe not.DerekJohnson said:If it's true, it's probably Saban doing this as a favor to Kiffen, nothing more. Sark will probably have no direct impact on the offense, but Kiffen and he will be able to talk late every night about bubble screens and/or bubble butts.
Sark isn't as big a dumbass as he gets made out to be. Not head coach material, sure, but he can actually be a decent assistant. Super Bowl champion Pete Carroll seems to agree, and people forget that Charlie Weiss was an abject failure as a HC but a bona fide success under Belichick.
That's what I thought.
He's an intern until he can prove the the head coach that he is worth a shit. HTH.
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How many national championships have you won Derek?
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Wish I could be in Alabama to witness Kiffin and Sark go full Bama on some SEC coeds
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Someone needs to stock the liquor cabinetsPurpleJ said:
He isn't being hired as an OC and I'm not Nick Saban.DerekJohnson said:
Would you hire him as your OC?PurpleJ said:
Or Saban knows that Sark actually has something to offer as an assistant and he has nothing to lose, because he holds all the cards. He doesn't need to do favors for Lane. What would his motivation even be? Keeping him? He just let his DC go get a head coach job, so I doubt he intends on holding on to Lane. He wants him to graduate and maybe he thinks he can turn Sark into his replacement. Maybe not.DerekJohnson said:If it's true, it's probably Saban doing this as a favor to Kiffen, nothing more. Sark will probably have no direct impact on the offense, but Kiffen and he will be able to talk late every night about bubble screens and/or bubble butts.
Sark isn't as big a dumbass as he gets made out to be. Not head coach material, sure, but he can actually be a decent assistant. Super Bowl champion Pete Carroll seems to agree, and people forget that Charlie Weiss was an abject failure as a HC but a bona fide success under Belichick.
That's what I thought.
He's an intern until he can prove the the head coach that he is worth a shit. HTH. -
The parallels between that and 2012 LSU was a great point I didn't think of.
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La Tour EifelBrickSquad said:Wish I could be in Alabama to witness Kiffin and Sark go full Bama on some SEC coeds
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Good article. I read it.
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You can read?Swaye said:Good article. I read it.
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False advertising.
Headline prison rape and then talk only about college football.
Disappointed. -
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Now we're getting somewhereSwaye said: -
Lol. This is the hubris right fucking here. Always the same. When a little turns out alright we go full krisvashon and assume more must be better. Human fucking nature. We confuse being lucky with being brilliant.
There is no way adding that retard to the Tuscaloosas will be a good thing.
But this is why all things, good and bad, end. They have to. Rome fell, the US will fall in time ... and so will Bama, though not this season.
The beginning of the end is when SabanSaban makes a full nuclear retard decision to poison his staff with one too many frat bros.
I can't wait. -
Or he retires.creepycoug said:Lol. This is the hubris right fucking here. Always the same. When a little turns out alright we go full krisvashon and assume more must be better. Human fucking nature. We confuse being lucky with being brilliant.
There is no way adding that retard to the Tuscaloosas will be a good thing.
But this is why all things, good and bad, end. They have to. Rome fell, the US will fall in time ... and so will Bama, though not this season.
The beginning of the end is when SabanSaban makes a full nuclear retard decision to poison his staff with one too many frat bros.
I can't wait. -
Three teams from Power-5 Conferences lost to in-state Division I-AA teams: Iowa State, Virginia, and Washington State.
An SEC team lost to a Sun Belt team: Mississippi State lost to South Alabama.
Although not a loss, another SEC team (Tennessee) needed OT to beat a Sun Belt team (Appalacian State).
An SEC team lost to a Conference USA team: Kentucky lost to Southern Mississippi.
A Big Ten team lost to a MAC team: Northwestern lost to Western Michigan.
And finally, USC suffered its third worst loss in school history, losing to Alabama by 46 points. -
Everyone sucks except Bama then?Gladstone said:Three teams from Power-5 Conferences lost to in-state Division I-AA teams: Iowa State, Virginia, and Washington State.
An SEC team lost to a Sun Belt team: Mississippi State lost to South Alabama.
Although not a loss, another SEC team (Tennessee) needed OT to beat a Sun Belt team (Appalacian State).
An SEC team lost to a Conference USA team: Kentucky lost to Southern Mississippi.
A Big Ten team lost to a MAC team: Northwestern lost to Western Michigan.
And finally, USC suffered its third worst loss in school history, losing to Alabama by 46 points. -
1. Sarkisian was never in a fraternity.creepycoug said:Lol. This is the hubris right fucking here. Always the same. When a little turns out alright we go full krisvashon and assume more must be better. Human fucking nature. We confuse being lucky with being brilliant.
There is no way adding that retard to the Tuscaloosas will be a good thing.
But this is why all things, good and bad, end. They have to. Rome fell, the US will fall in time ... and so will Bama, though not this season.
The beginning of the end is when SabanSaban makes a full nuclear retard decision to poison his staff with one too many frat bros.
I can't wait.
2. If we're going to BASH frat bros, then I am fucking OUT.
