Comprehensive List of Things that SUCKED (feel free to add)

jecornel said:

Karta's pitch play to dwash? Strangest play I have seen in years. Karta comes in for one play to execute a toss sweep? Which was poorly executed and was clearly going to nowhere. *Babushka needs to get stabbed in each eye with an ice pick.

A lateral passing game is the equivalent of Chinese torture. *What the fuck is this shit? Every fucking time throw to the side, nothing happens. How is that not noticeable to a college coordinator?

No use of the TE's whatsoever? Guys that are 6'4" & 6'5"??? Lets just not use them? Perkins is a nice player. *Not using the TEs should be punishable by rape.

No fan of Mickens. *Jaydon Mickens lost us the game when, instead of just running upfield to a wide open field and scoring, he decided to break sideways, thus surprising Lenius and getting a holding penalty which fucked our asses.

J smith is an absolute train wreck. Their game plan hurt Browning. *I thought Jake looked good (for a true freshman in his first game). Babushka is horrifyingly bad.


Does this staff realize that it is okay to throw over the middle? I know Browning sailed a couple but come on. *COME THE FUCK ON!

You aren't going to win games throwing to the flat and sideways. It just won't work. *IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE. OUR OFFENSE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE.

You can't count on Pettis every week to give you pts on special teams. *Thank God for Pettis.

What the hell are they doing in practice? The run game was atrocious. Had Cooper been healthy he would have likely replaced Dwash. *Cooper sucks, HTH.

Defense improved in the second half. Must tackle better, and Victor will be a HH legend soon enough. *Defense looked fine once they settled down. Azeem Victor is a fucking baller. We replaced 5 of our front 7; it took them a second to find themselves, but they completely dominated Boise after that. Very encouraging. Imagine what they would do if our offense sustained drives!

Did anyone really think Vanwinky was going to make it? Not a chance. *It definitely seemed like he wasn't going to. We did such a nice job of going backwards for him.

There so many things to pick apart but J Smith needs to move on. He has no clue what he is doing. *Babushka deserves to have Gilby take a shit on his face, get hit in the nads with a baseball bat by Azeem Victor and then have Gertrude from J.P. Patches fame stab him to death with a pick-axe.

Offense has even appeared to somehow take a step back from last year. How is that even possible? *The mind fucking boggles.

Take away the punt return and you have a dumpster fire with 100ft flames. *You don't have to take away the punt return for that.

Honestly, I think we can be pretty good. It's just clear that all Sark's players save for Josh Perkins, Darell Daniels, Azeem Victor, Joe Mathis and Elijah Qualls need to be benched. Everyone else is a loser piece of shit. Just whole sale, get rid of those decroded pieces of crap.

On O: Eldrenkamp should die, Brostek should die, Tufunga should be raped, Coleman Shelton should transfer to Montana, Dwayne Warshington should get a Colombian neck tie, Mickens should be tortured by US Special forces for the rest of his life.

On Feeney should be killed immediately, Keishawn Bierria should be raped, Psalm Wooching should be raped and Cory Littleton should get his armed hacked off and raped Central African Republic style.

Jake Browning looked good. Myles Gaskin is a true freshman, but he looked fine. Pettis and Lenius are probably good, though it would be nice to throw to them... Our D will be really good by the end of the season, but Feeney at Buck is a disaster. They should move Joe Mathis to Buck and Dissly to end. Feeney should go back to SAM and Bierria should be replaced.

Lenius poor situational awareness on the 3rd and 12. Get to the sticks.

J. Smith needs to go. That's Peterman's problem and ultimately it's his fault.

Despite that, this team will eventually be fine. Sark's laziness, lack of discipline, and sizzle without steak is wearing off. Compare this gayme to Hawaii last year. It's not even close. We're young for the 12th straight year but eventually we won't be. Guys are buying in.