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Drunken Cry for help: About to go on a date with a former lesbian

DooglesDoogles Member, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 12,549 Founders Club
edited July 2015 in Tug Tavern
The title says it all. I just passed out for 3 hours in my local bars parking lot, skipped over to ross and bought a serviceable button up, and am about to meet a girl who used to munch rug for a living at smugglers cove (which is one of the top 100 bars in the world according to some hype mag). I'm still blasted from the day. How do I swindle a 3some while only able to articulate 2 syllable words MAX?
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  • Dick_BDick_B Member Posts: 1,301
    RaceBannon said:

    Rules for life

    The less you say the smarter people think you are

    which explains your rep........
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  • TierbsHsotBoobsTierbsHsotBoobs Member Posts: 39,680
    Doogles said:

    The title says it all. I just passed out for 3 hours in my local bars parking lot, skipped over to ross and bought a serviceable button up, and am about to meet a girl who used to munch rug for a living at smugglers cove (which is one of the top 100 bars in the world according to some hype mag). I'm still blasted from the day. How do I swindle a 3some while only able to articulate 2 syllable words MAX?

    Flagged because I don't have the authority to delete this bullshit post that does not include pictures.
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  • FenwickFenwick Member Posts: 1,174
    For me it was the best lay I ever had. For you I have severe doubts.
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  • BallSackedBallSacked Member Posts: 3,279
    edited July 2015
    image

    Applies to 81% of Doogles posts.
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  • RoadDawg55RoadDawg55 Member Posts: 30,123
    edited July 2015
    Doogles said:

    The title says it all. I just passed out for 3 hours in my local bars parking lot, skipped over to ross and bought a serviceable button up, and am about to meet a girl who used to munch rug for a living at smugglers cove (which is one of the top 100 bars in the world according to some hype mag). I'm still blasted from the day. How do I swindle a 3some while only able to articulate 2 syllable words MAX?

    I'll take this at face value and say get some blow. Don't get a ball and crack out, just get a gram and take a few bumps as needed to sober you up.
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  • SwayeSwaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,361 Founders Club
    Well, did you bang her?
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  • 2001400ex2001400ex Member Posts: 29,457
    Here's a cool story, bro. My buddy has a 22 year old daughter, who already has a child. She's smoking hot, tig ole bitties, a hair chunky but nothing a few weeks in the gym wouldn't fix. She's living with this lesbian who's kinda converting her, which bothers the shit out of my buddy. He's not into gay people in any way. He's been telling me for a year that her friend is ugly, saying he'd be fine if she was with a hot lesbian, so I'd been picturing something like what CFetters posted. I finally met her last weekend and she's actually pretty hot herself. She was wearing boy shorts and a dudes button up shirt. But shit, put a dress on her and she be hot.
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  • PurpleThrobberPurpleThrobber Member Posts: 43,685 Standard Supporter
    Someone keeps score in this shithole?!?

    Who knew?
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  • CFetters_Nacho_LoverCFetters_Nacho_Lover Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 30,010 Founders Club
    GrundleStiltzkin said:

    Forgot one
    Janet Reno LOL photo JanetRenoLOL.jpg

    Didn't forget it, just didn't wanna share it.
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  • PurpleJPurpleJ Member Posts: 37,020 Founders Club
    allpurpleallgold said:

    You're drunk and have probably already fucked it up by now. But for future reference, don't bring up the threesome. Every dumb fuck guy she's ever known has tried that.

    You'll overestimate how clever you are and think you can make it funny but real. You'll sound like a dumbass. Just like every other dumb ass before you.

    If you want a threesome so bad then pay for it. Stop bothering this poor girl.

    Don't listen to APAG. Ask her anyways.
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