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Changing my identity

HuskyJW
HuskyJW Member Posts: 15,313
in Tug Tavern
I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?
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  • 2001400ex
    2001400ex Member Posts: 29,457
    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    I'm sure you at least qualify for the mentally handicapped college grant.
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  • DerekJohnson
    DerekJohnson Administrator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 68,539 Founders Club
    "You know, I think I'm going to 'identify' as skinny. That way I will not have to ever go on a diet. I'm just gonna 'identify' as skinny. I just am. You think I'm not? Screw you!"

    -Rush Limbaugh
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  • dnc
    dnc Member Posts: 56,840
    2015 will forever be remembered as the year the phrase "I identify myself as" jumped the fucking shark
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  • 2001400ex
    2001400ex Member Posts: 29,457
    DerekJohnson said:

    PurpleJ said:

    What a special day to be a Rush Limbaugh dick sucking conservative that posts here. This just confirms (in your minds) all of the drivel that you guys suck out of his ass.

    I hear there's a new post up on Dawgboard.
    Pressing.
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  • Citrus4Troogs
    Citrus4Troogs Member Posts: 248
    Now by "go fuck yourself," I mean to say that most opportunities for 25 year-old Asian women involve 40 year-old blue eyed white guys.

    Go fuck yourself.
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  • AZDuck
    AZDuck Member Posts: 15,381
    DerekJohnson said:

    PurpleJ said:

    What a special day to be a Rush Limbaugh dick sucking conservative that posts here. This just confirms (in your minds) all of the drivel that you guys suck out of his ass.

    I hear there's a new post up on Dawgboard.
    https://youtu.be/YxzxmQykQ4s
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  • DerekJohnson
    DerekJohnson Administrator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 68,539 Founders Club
    2001400ex said:

    DerekJohnson said:

    PurpleJ said:

    What a special day to be a Rush Limbaugh dick sucking conservative that posts here. This just confirms (in your minds) all of the drivel that you guys suck out of his ass.

    I hear there's a new post up on Dawgboard.
    Pressing.
    Au contraire. PurpleJ has publicly stated he doesn't like the direction this board is taking.
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  • PurpleJ
    PurpleJ Member Posts: 37,643 Founders Club
    DerekJohnson said:

    2001400ex said:

    DerekJohnson said:

    PurpleJ said:

    What a special day to be a Rush Limbaugh dick sucking conservative that posts here. This just confirms (in your minds) all of the drivel that you guys suck out of his ass.

    I hear there's a new post up on Dawgboard.
    Pressing.
    Au contraire. PurpleJ has publicly stated he doesn't like the direction this board is taking.
    I said I wasn't sure I liked it. Stop twisting.
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  • 2001400ex
    2001400ex Member Posts: 29,457
    I identify as a cat so I don't have to pay income taxes.

    http://www.salon.com/2015/06/16/fox_news_andrea_tantaros_considers_identifying_as_a_cat_to_avoid_paying_income_taxes/

    photo Screen-Shot-2015-03-24-at-3.36.19-PM-620x412_zpsuu2b7nap.png
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  • TierbsHsotBoobs
    TierbsHsotBoobs Member Posts: 39,680
    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    Paging @Meek
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  • PurpleThrobber
    PurpleThrobber Member Posts: 48,128 Standard Supporter
    Citrus4Troogs said:

    Now by "go fuck yourself," I mean to say that most opportunities for 25 year-old Asian women involve 40 year-old blue eyed white guys.

    Go fuck yourself.

    In defense of fucking and Asian women:

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=EOl--Vkj6Rs
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  • TierbsHsotBoobs
    TierbsHsotBoobs Member Posts: 39,680
    Southerndawg said:

    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    Self identifying as a 25 year old Asian Woman will only get you loans and grants for a start up massage parlor that specializes in happy endings or a scholarship to UC Berkeley. If you want the big kit, self identify as a 65 year old "African American"/ "Native American" mix who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads.
    That's some serious FREE PUB! for @RaceBannon.
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  • dnc
    dnc Member Posts: 56,840
    Southerndawg said:

    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    Self identifying as a 25 year old Asian Woman will only get you loans and grants for a start up massage parlor that specializes in happy endings or a scholarship to UC Berkeley. If you want the big kit, self identify as a 65 year old "African American"/ "Native American" mix who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads.
    quads?
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  • Swaye
    Swaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,739 Founders Club
    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    You went from Splooge to his daughter?
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  • Swaye
    Swaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,739 Founders Club
    Southerndawg said:

    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    Self identifying as a 25 year old Asian Woman will only get you loans and grants for a start up massage parlor that specializes in happy endings or a scholarship to UC Berkeley. If you want the big kit, self identify as a 65 year old "African American"/ "Native American" mix who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads.
    I am halfway there I see.
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  • dnc
    dnc Member Posts: 56,840
    Swaye said:

    Southerndawg said:

    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    Self identifying as a 25 year old Asian Woman will only get you loans and grants for a start up massage parlor that specializes in happy endings or a scholarship to UC Berkeley. If you want the big kit, self identify as a 65 year old "African American"/ "Native American" mix who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads.
    I am halfway there I see.
    The "Native American" who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads half?
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  • AZDuck
    AZDuck Member Posts: 15,381
    AZDuck said:

    DerekJohnson said:

    PurpleJ said:

    What a special day to be a Rush Limbaugh dick sucking conservative that posts here. This just confirms (in your minds) all of the drivel that you guys suck out of his ass.

    I hear there's a new post up on Dawgboard.
    https://youtu.be/YxzxmQykQ4s
    "Speaking of Satan, I was watching Rush Limbaugh the other day.

    Doesn't Rush Limbaugh remind you of one of those gay guys who likes to lay in a tub while other men pee on him?

    Can't you see his fat body in a tub while Reagan, Quayle and Bush just … [pee noise]

    Just standing around pissing on him, and his piggly-wiggly dick can't get hard.

    So they call in Barbara Bush …    "

    Bill Hicks speaks for me
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  • Swaye
    Swaye Moderator, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 41,739 Founders Club
    dnc said:

    Swaye said:

    Southerndawg said:

    HuskyJW said:

    I no longer want to be a 40 year old blue eyed white guy.

    I now identify myself as a 25 year old Asian woman....what sort of grants and start up business opportunities do I qualify for?

    Self identifying as a 25 year old Asian Woman will only get you loans and grants for a start up massage parlor that specializes in happy endings or a scholarship to UC Berkeley. If you want the big kit, self identify as a 65 year old "African American"/ "Native American" mix who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads.
    I am halfway there I see.
    The "Native American" who is also a quadriplegic transgender lesbian with two dads half?
    Try as I might, I can't get anything past you.
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