It is clear to everyone following the Alabama game that we are really close. The need for a new offensive coordinator aside, we still don't quite match up with Alabama in terms of personel though. A lot of our starters are every bit as good as theirs, but we lack depth, and in some position groups like OL we're hurting. I think that it is time that we the denizens of Hardcore Husky began to give back to the program like only we can. Sure, there are obviously financial contributions we can make, but I believe we can create value-adds that more directly will help with recruiting. Once word of our programs spreads parents will be clamoring to send their kids here.
1) The Harcore Husky Mentorship ProgramThis is obviously a front for giving the kids money while pretending to be offering career advice, life coaching, etc. The way it works is you meet at some coffee vendor - make sure the athletes buy their own coffee - and then as a token of gratitude the athlete busses the trash for you.
2) The Hardcore Husky Alcohol for Minors Purchase ProgramTo the best of my knowledge the Bridge Program has a few gaps while introducing athletes to life at UW. For one it doesn't tell them who they can get alochol from. While they will inevitably figure it out in time, we can help them hit the ground running. We consume enough alochol here already that no one will notice the 5% uptick in alcohol purchases that it will take to supply the football team.
3) The Hardcore Husky Academic Achievement Tutoring ProgramAthletes already have tutors, but some of them follow the rules. These kids didn't go to UW to play school and we should quit making them waste their time on meaningless class work. I am certain that the vast majority of posters here are capable of replicating athlete-quality academic works. They will already teams carrying them in group projects so we will mostly only have to write essays and fill out Geology 101 worksheets.
4) The Hardcore Husky Godparent ProgramIn the tragic event something should happen to an athletes family, we can all rest easier knowing that there are loving individuals like us ready to step in and take care of these kids. There should be plenty of space in my parent's basement for another sleeper sofa if I clear out some of the pizza boxes and I'm sure others here could do the same. Likewise if one of the athlete's dad's dies we could also marry in and become the new dad #2. The emotional safety net this provides will undoubtedly be popular with parents.

5) The Hardcore Husky Job Placement ProgramNow this will be tough since the majority of us are unemployed, but some of us here are in positions to provide guaranteed jobs for those who don't make it to the NFL. Race Bannon is always looking for qualified bark rakers and Dennis DeYoung probably will need a chauffeur for life. I can introduce some of them into my multi-level marketing program. We can make it known that when you join UW you're set for life.

Now these are just a few of the many ways that we here at Hardcore Husky can help attract the best recruits to UW. If anyone else has GOOD ideas I'm happy to hear them. If this is highly effective maybe the UW AD will decide the sponsor the boards!
Comments
Once you attract more bugs and rodents you can blame the prior owner for neglect, and sell them a much more expensive treatment to rid them of the infestation
That's assuming you can negotiate yourself some of the increased fee - if you get paid the same no matter what then fuck it - if anything water the stuff down to ve passive - aggressive