USC Athletics: Cult or Banana Republic?

Hire former USC All-American Mike Garrett as Athletic Director (AD credentials: none).

Shove aside Garrett.

Hire former USC All-American Pat Haden as replacement (AD credentials: none)

Dump Haden.

Hire former USC All-American Lynn Swann (AD credentials: none)

Hire much-maligned Lane Kiffin for (arguably) college's football's best head coaching job.

Fire him 3.5 years later.

Hire Kiffin's fat and drunk older brother, Steve Kardashian, who about to implode at Washington.

Fire Kardashian 1.5 years later.

Give the job to a lightly regarded coordinator with a middling 6-4 record in two stints as USC's head coach.

So how long can we expect Swann and Helton last?

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Comments

PurpleJ

Should have gone with Snoop Dogg!

GrundleStiltzkin

NEsnake12

1 game. Both fired on the 50 yard line after they lose by 8 TDs to Bama.

digits

Highly entertaining. You can't make this shit up.

LoneStarDawg

1 game. Both fired on the 50 yard line after they lose by 8 TDs to Bama.

Disagree, it'll be 55 minutes of "you don't know how bad the mess was under haden"

Weve lived this script for 15 years

EsophagealFeces

1 game. Both fired on the 50 yard line after they lose by 8 TDs to Bama.
Disagree, it'll be 55 minutes of "you don't know how bad the mess was under haden"

Weve lived this script for 15 years

I think you misspelled "You have no idea the damage Sark and Haden did."

dnc

I think the Kiffin hire was somewhat defensible. The others were rifuckingdiculous.

GreenRiverGatorz

I think the Kiffin hire was somewhat defensible. The others were rifuckingdiculous.

Disagree. Fired by the Raiders, one average season at Tennessee, and all of a sudden he's ready for one of the top five jobs of college football? All of USC's personnel moves of the last six years have been pants-on-head retarded.

TTJ

I'm with @dnc on this. Kiffin wasn't a great hire, but he was USC's least worst hire by far.

Those folks down in Knoxville are more butthurt about the way Kiffin left than disappointed with his on-field results.

dnc

I'm with @dnc on this. Kiffin wasn't a great hire, but he was USC's least worst hire by far.

Those folks down in Knoxville are more butthurt about the way Kiffin left than disappointed with his on-field results.

Bingo

DerekJohnson

Swann "gets it"

Alexis

I can't answer this question, because I thought Banana Republic was a store where I get my cargo shorts and I'm pretty sure you can't get cargo shorts at USC so it doesn't make sense.