Cocaine found in White House

Blueduck · July 2023

I'm hearing it was a tiny little bag so... No biggie

huskyhooligan · July 2023

Bob_C said:
https://twitter.com/troyrubert/status/1676953719659966466?s=46&t=TF5YSHjB9Hq6ZBrenucnTg

Any word on the Asian tourist who did this and didn't know they were supporting white supremacy / GOT pawn at the same time?

jecornel · July 2023

What a time to be alive.

Sledog · July 2023

Has to be Hunter. Every person is run though a magnetometer and checked by dope dogs etc. Except the first family.

creepycoug · July 2023

Good! They ought to blow some up the POTUS' nose to breath a little life into that corpse. Have we ever had a more dead man walking, lost, confused and fucked up human being in that office, ever? Setting aside politics entirely, the guy has an entire leg in the ground and is swinging the other one over here presently. I will be shocked af if he's alive in a year's time.

That dude SERIOUSLY aged between his stint as VPOTUS and when he launched his campaign from an LA studio.

Sledog · July 2023

New Clue board game answer: It was Hunter, in the library with the rolled up $100.00 bill!

Southerndawg · July 2023

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a press conference this morning, interim DC Police Chief Ashan Benedict said that while they have top investigators on the case, they may never know exactly who left a bag of cocaine labeled "Property of H. Biden" in the White House while Hunter Biden was there.

"Listen, this is a difficult case to solve," said Benedict to reporters. "The initial 'H' could be anyone. Hank, Herman, Harry... the possibilities are endless. We will do our best to solve this, but we need the American people to know that this extraordinarily difficult case might just be unsolvable forever."

Sources close to the case confirmed that police had planned to dust for fingerprints, but they accidentally lost their fingerprinting kit. They were then going to review security footage of the room where the hard drugs were found, but the tapes for that time period accidentally fell into a bucket of hydrochloric acid and were ruined. DNA tests also proved fruitless, as almost all of the DNA found in the White House belongs to Bill Clinton.

"This is a case that may haunt me for the rest of my life," said lead Detective Frank Drebin as several laser dots appeared on his forehead. "I'm completely stumped here. I really hate to see the bad guys get away like that."

At publishing time, DC Police had also lamented the unsolvable case of the dead hooker they just found buried in the Rose Garden.

Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/dc-police-say-they-will-probably-never-discover-who-left-bag-of-cocaine-labeled-property-of-h-biden-at-white-house