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What the HOLY FUCK is this ?!
pawz
Member, Swaye's Wigwam Posts: 18,757
So for the lulz I did a search for "Peter Puffer Machine" thinking, oh dear what I'm I possibly getting myself into. And I stumbled across this forum. And it's soooo... out-fucking-rageous that I truly can't tell if everyone is in on the gag, or they are fucking serious. The traffic on this Forum is no joke.
Either way, they are going to need a Cinque Raisons.
The Landover Baptist Church Forum
"Noobs" please read this before posting.
READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!
Ask an Ex-Negro
Looking to expand my resume.
As an ex-negro who has unlimited admiration for the White Christian Man whom I believe is a role model all nigras, gooks, and other minorities to follow to get closer to Jesus, I decided to look at my resume and make a list of all the White Christian Men who I have worked for. I count only 12. I decided to post this personal ad looking for work with men who need help within the Freehold community. Pay is not an issue. This is solely to make my resume look better and to give back to the Freehold community. Shovelin? I’ll shovel. Clean your gutters or septic tank? That’s a job I’m an expert at. Pickin the crops at your farm? Do you even need to ask?
Is Blake Griffin a good Christian?
I'm trying to pick my favorite team for next year's NBA season and I'm leaning towards the Los Angeles Clippers. I have read a bit about their leader and star player Blake Griffin and I'd like to know a little more about him.
He's the son of a pastor and was home-schooled and believes in The Creation.
Quote:
After the home schooling came to a close, Griffin finished out the rest of high school at Oklahoma Christian School.4 And when he went to college and made the basketball team, he quickly joined the Fellowship of Christian Athletes.5
However, his parents are mixed-race, so this is a potential problem.
Also, he has been appearing in KIA advertisements, but the Korean car manufacturer has pulled their support for the Clippers. I see this as an advantage.
What do you think about this young man?
The moar I read, the moar I prayingdoog.gif this entire message bored is a WOOOOOOSSSSHHHHH!
The moar I read, the moar I think they are dead fucking serious. W, JW.
Either way, they are going to need a Cinque Raisons.
The Landover Baptist Church Forum
"Noobs" please read this before posting.
READ THIS BEFORE YOU FLAME US!
Ask an Ex-Negro
Looking to expand my resume.
As an ex-negro who has unlimited admiration for the White Christian Man whom I believe is a role model all nigras, gooks, and other minorities to follow to get closer to Jesus, I decided to look at my resume and make a list of all the White Christian Men who I have worked for. I count only 12. I decided to post this personal ad looking for work with men who need help within the Freehold community. Pay is not an issue. This is solely to make my resume look better and to give back to the Freehold community. Shovelin? I’ll shovel. Clean your gutters or septic tank? That’s a job I’m an expert at. Pickin the crops at your farm? Do you even need to ask?
Is Blake Griffin a good Christian?
I'm trying to pick my favorite team for next year's NBA season and I'm leaning towards the Los Angeles Clippers. I have read a bit about their leader and star player Blake Griffin and I'd like to know a little more about him.
He's the son of a pastor and was home-schooled and believes in The Creation.
Quote:
After the home schooling came to a close, Griffin finished out the rest of high school at Oklahoma Christian School.4 And when he went to college and made the basketball team, he quickly joined the Fellowship of Christian Athletes.5
However, his parents are mixed-race, so this is a potential problem.
Also, he has been appearing in KIA advertisements, but the Korean car manufacturer has pulled their support for the Clippers. I see this as an advantage.
What do you think about this young man?
The moar I read, the moar I prayingdoog.gif this entire message bored is a WOOOOOOSSSSHHHHH!
The moar I read, the moar I think they are dead fucking serious. W, JW.
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Landover_Baptist_Church
The Landover Baptist Church is the website of a parody fundamentalist Baptist church. The church lampoons fundamentalist, Independent Baptist churches and Biblical literalism, and originated as a satire of Liberty University.
Contents
1 Origin
2 Description
3 See also
4 References
5 External links
Origin
The site was created by Chris Harper, who obtained his master's degree in English literature from George Mason University in 1993 after being expelled from Liberty University (founded by Jerry Falwell) in 1989 for producing a radio show satirising the school's procedures[1] which Liberty's administration found offensive.[2] Harper responded to the expulsion by creating the Landover Baptist Church website, described by Pop Matters as both a parody and an exposé of the religious subculture at Liberty.[1]
In an example of Poe's law, some members of the Christian community have supported some of the outlandish stories on the website,[1] and a book[3] about Hello Kitty mistakenly cites a joke article on the Landover site as an example of the "dead seriousness" of the Christian right's opposition to Japanese culture.[4]
Description
The church is located in the fictional town of Freehold, Iowa.[5] It is described as operating under a dictatorial structure whereby its "Pastor" holds all authority over the church, its members, and its extensive holdings. The church supposedly uses an elaborate fine system to maintain its authority over its members, parodying Jerry Falwell's system at Liberty University,[6] and in addition can force its members to comply with any and all of its wishes (a common phrase on the website used in such cases is that the member "mandatorily volunteered" to comply). In cases of expulsion the member is also removed from the church property. The website describes Landover as having a "permanent injunction" against all "unsaved" persons, prohibiting them from being within ten miles of the Landover property as well as forbidding them to enter Landover's website.[7]
Within the Landover universe, the church is described as owning well over 1,000 acres (400 ha) in Freehold, with twenty-eight paid pastors, 412 full-time staff members, eleven fully equipped chapels, seven sanctuaries, a 100,000 seat amphitheater, twelve television studios, two radio stations, an academy, a university, two gated communities, twenty-seven developments, three office parks, as well as a shopping mall, amusement park, golf course, retirement community, foundation, fire and police department, circus camp, resort center, retreat center, and a number of fitness centers, swimming pools, hot springs, and cemeteries. An annual feature on the website is a story about the church's Halloween hell house.[8]
The site records that the initial pastor of Landover was Ben Ebeneezer Smith, and that upon his death his brother (Deacon Fred Smith) assumed the office. In and around June 2010 a "coup" was related to website visitors (in accordance with a spurious interpretation of Romans 13) whereby Pastor Harry Harkwell took over leadership. The site went on to describe Deacon Fred being "restored" to his pastorship after a "reconciliation" during Glenn Beck's Restoring Honor rally.
The Landover site also features material from Betty Bowers, a fictional central character on the satirical website BettyBowers.com. Bowers is portrayed by voice actress and comedian Deven Green, appearing both in photographs and numerous satirical videos. According to Bradley's fictional satirical biography of Bowers, she proclaims herself "America's Best Christian".[9] Listed as a member of the Landover Baptist Church,[10] Bowers operates several Christian ministries with names like "Bringing Integrity To Christian Homemakers" (B.I.T.C.H.)[11] and "Baptists Are Saving Homosexuals" (B.A.S.H.).[12]