Pole Tim: You're highest level of football played
Comments
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Janet RenoDoog_de_Jour said:
I was never blown the f up, but during warmups one of my teammate threw a football at me - it went right IN MY FACE.GrundleStiltzkin said:Keep this shit coming, love the blown the f up stories.
Nose was fine, but my glasses were broken.
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High School
Sadly, we grew apart and she dumped me for her hot lipstick lesbo girlfriend. Oh, those were the tims!Doog_de_Jour said:
What happened with you and the girl?Laocoön said:I received a few letters to small schools for basketball (Seamount all leaguer), but followed a girl to Udub & became an IMA Legend in my own mind.
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High SchoolAlright, I’ll play. Two amazingly shitty stories.
Hoe’s Hill I played in 9th grade. Had never played so they had me suit up for the JV game. Had two picks in that game and returned one for 6. On O I just blocked all game because we didn’t throw the ball once. Game tied, 7-7 and I ask the coach to throw it to me. Have no clue what route I ran but caught this dead duck out of the sky and ran it for a TD. We win, definitely peeked at football that day.
Fast forward, senior yr, hadn’t played football since 9th grade but ended up as the starting DB going into camp at EWU. Scrimmaging some hillbilly school and they do a TE screen to this dude twice my size. I did my best Ronnie Lott impression and turned my self into a heat seeking missile. Well, I flipped and got an awesome concussion.
Decided it was a good idea to organize boxing matches while there as well. Concussion #2 in two days.
Decided I wanted a pizza so while the pizza guy ran pizzas to another dorm, I stole a box and devoured it with an under classman who just smoked a J all by himself. There was a 10 pizza bounty on my head and other guy didn’t snitch.
Then decided to go off campus and hook up a QP for us and a few other players from other schools. Also buying cigs for all the underagers as I was 18 senior yr.
Then hooked up with a cheer leader. Who fucking holds a cheerleading camp at the same place and time as a football camp.
Lost my starting spot from concussion #1 and saw mop-up time the rest of the year. Eventually quit cause the coach didn’t like me coming to weight training class high as fuck and then stealing money from the lockers. Fucking Trump.
At least camp was cool... kinda.
CSB, thanks. -
Janet Reno
There was only one Dwag on the '05 NE team.KkkliffKkklingsbury said:I dabbled
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corey_Dillon
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Janet RenoAs a child, I had other aspirations for what my future would be. My parents told me that I could achieve the impossible if I had three things: belief, persistence, and an insatiable appetite.
Needless to say, after years of dedication and hard work, I made my dreams come true and became a legend amongst men.
I’d like to think that is worth more than any football player in history could say for themselves. -
None, I am cowardAfter not getting a scholarship to #mybeavs I gave up the dream and just went there with full tuition.
But nothing will dampen my pride and love of oregon state football -
None, I am cowardNever played a lick of football. But our? DWAGS look at my name up on the wall as they eat their pre game meal. WOOF! SNARL!
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High Schoolhuskyhooligan said:
Attempted, high school, bent a knee the wrong way, PT bill came and one of my dads said I could go out for the chess team. Broke a finger the next year playing speed chess. What was once a promising career ended in giving sexual favors to dads and moms in the bathroom on parent teacher night, and the occasional administrator.
My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really.
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High SchoolLaocoön said:
I received a few letters to small schools for basketball (Seamount all leaguer), but followed a girl to Udub & became an IMA Legend in my own mind.
What high school? -
High SchoolGrundleStiltzkin said:
Keep this shit coming, love the blown the f up stories.
As I mentioned, my football skills didn't mature until after high school and I was limited to flag football and grab ass but I was on the team in high school. While we didn't have an official scout team MVP, I think I pretty was it all 3 years (#myLancers had a freshman team and I did start my freshman year).
One JV game, my coach grabs me and puts me in at DB. I'm wearing lineman gloves but he thought I was good enough to play DB. Either that or he was tired of seeing me get knocked on my ass as a DE.
I quickly realized you don't get as beat up playing DB so I started putting myself as a safety on the scout team. Buddy of mine was the starting H-back, slot guy, wing whatever it's called in a wing-T offense. Offense runs a sweep to the right and I'm his blocking assignment. I didn't keep my head on a swivel and Ronnie got me with a blindside block that knocked my helmet sideways (I CAN'T SEE!!!!) and broke my facemark. -
Middle SchoolMy high school didn't have a football team
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Middle School
Row Peter Puffer!YellowSnow said:Never played a lick of football. But our? DWAGS look at my name up on the wall as they eat their pre game meal. WOOF! SNARL!
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Middle School
Joe Jarzynka?dnc said:
TOO TALLbackthepack said:
Joe Jeravicius?dnc said:
LOL same.Doog_de_Jour said:Flag football in an intramural league.
We were first loosers and I lead the league in TDs.
I was a real Steve Largent, Wayne Chrebet, Wes Welker type. -
JuCo/Small College
Oh myDerekJohnson said:My high school didn't have a football team
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Middle SchoolMy dad went to UW, and played intramural football. He was quarterback of the "Chinese Bandits", throwing passes to Dave Torrell. True story.
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Middle School
No athletic program at all. But we did have a weight room, so I'd go in there and lift weights with the other delinquents who had been thrown out of regular high schoolsGrundleStiltzkin said:
Oh myDerekJohnson said:My high school didn't have a football team
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Pro
This is one of the top 10 posts in the history of this shithole.huskyhooligan said:
Attempted, high school, bent a knee the wrong way, PT bill came and one of my dads said I could go out for the chess team. Broke a finger the next year playing speed chess. What was once a promising career ended in giving sexual favors to dads and moms in the bathroom on parent teacher night, and the occasional administrator.
My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. -
ProSo I went to a really big tim football school in Texas (played for the State 5A Championship last year and were always at least solid going back decades). I think pictures always speak a thousand words, so I'll just show a random picture of the team and you can draw your own conclusions as to what the coaches thought when a skinny 115 pound dipshit half breed showed up for tryouts. Getting shitcanned not only probably saved my life, but also allowed me to find my true love, competitive weed smoking. State Champion 1986-1989 and this is undisputed.
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ProAlso, this post is destined for Classics. If you disagree you should drink a gallon of kerosene and then deep throat a road flare.
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I could never live up to what my dad expected from me
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High SchoolI "played" for a certain little high school which was quite the experience. And by little I mean it was and still is the largest high school in the state of Virginia. 25 years after the season which inspired Disney to make a different-racial-backgrounds-coming-together-to-win-title feel good movie, the school was significantly more diverse. And there were no Gerry Bertiers walking through that door; we had around 10 white doods on the team and we all sucked.
Rolling in as a 6'3" 145lb Freshman trying to play QB because you think you can read a defense, throw an ok football and aren't fast went amazingly well for a team trying to run the triple option. But my try hard slow strategy ass did so, no matter how many times I got blown up in practice. Try hard slow strategy gonna try hard slow strategy, so I was the punter and holder in addition to being a back up QB on the freshman team. And sometimes did kickoffs.
Bulked up to 190 and grew to 6'5" and kept on being backup QB but since the triple option was not going away I added TE and DE to my try-hardness since playing football is fun. That kept me around for the next 2 years before I got tired of knee injuries. I joined the debate team instead and was much more successful there.
Real life Bill Yoast could not coach me into a decent QB; real life Herman Boone didn't teach me shit about how to drive a car from his drivers ed class and real life Petey was an amazing equipment manager and hall monitor. I am forever grateful to Petey for getting me extra rib pads so I could keep getting destroyed with my 5.0 40 speed without dying. -
High School
Important edit. Coaches name was Tramp, Tim Tramp, not trump.dirtysouwfdawg said:Alright, I’ll play. Two amazingly shitty stories.
Hoe’s Hill I played in 9th grade. Had never played so they had me suit up for the JV game. Had two picks in that game and returned one for 6. On O I just blocked all game because we didn’t throw the ball once. Game tied, 7-7 and I ask the coach to throw it to me. Have no clue what route I ran but caught this dead duck out of the sky and ran it for a TD. We win, definitely peeked at football that day.
Fast forward, senior yr, hadn’t played football since 9th grade but ended up as the starting DB going into camp at EWU. Scrimmaging some hillbilly school and they do a TE screen to this dude twice my size. I did my best Ronnie Lott impression and turned my self into a heat seeking missile. Well, I flipped and got an awesome concussion.
Decided it was a good idea to organize boxing matches while there as well. Concussion #2 in two days.
Decided I wanted a pizza so while the pizza guy ran pizzas to another dorm, I stole a box and devoured it with an under classman who just smoked a J all by himself. There was a 10 pizza bounty on my head and other guy didn’t snitch.
Then decided to go off campus and hook up a QP for us and a few other players from other schools. Also buying cigs for all the underagers as I was 18 senior yr.
Then hooked up with a cheer leader. Who fucking holds a cheerleading camp at the same place and time as a football camp.
Lost my starting spot from concussion #1 and saw mop-up time the rest of the year. Eventually quit cause the coach didn’t like me coming to weight training class high as fuck and then stealing money from the lockers. Fucking Trump.
At least camp was cool... kinda.
CSB, thanks. -
Middle SchoolSwaye said:
So I went to a really big tim football school in Texas (played for the State 5A Championship last year and were always at least solid going back decades). I think pictures always speak a thousand words, so I'll just show a random picture of the team and you can draw your own conclusions as to what the coaches thought when a skinny 115 pound dipshit half breed showed up for tryouts. Getting shitcanned not only probably saved my life, but also allowed me to find my true love, competitive weed smoking. State Champion 1986-1989 and this is undisputed.
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High SchoolI didn’t grow until my senior year of HS. I played football and basketball. Pretty bang average for a varsity athlete, good enough to be an IM god in college though.
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JuCo/Small CollegeReal talk, I really love all the stories. More please.
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High School
At my peak I may have been one of the best all around IM athletes in the cuntry. I’m a regular Deion Sanders.GrundleStiltzkin said:Real talk, I really love all the stories. More please.
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JuCo/Small Collegebackthepack said:
At my peak I may have been one of the best all around IM athletes in the cuntry. I’m a regular Deion Sanders.GrundleStiltzkin said:Real talk, I really love all the stories. More please.
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High School
Does getting knocked by Kyler Gordon at a team camp count?GrundleStiltzkin said:backthepack said:
At my peak I may have been one of the best all around IM athletes in the cuntry. I’m a regular Deion Sanders.GrundleStiltzkin said:Real talk, I really love all the stories. More please.
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JuCo/Small College
Biglybackthepack said:
Does getting knocked by Kyler Gordon at a team camp count?GrundleStiltzkin said:backthepack said:
At my peak I may have been one of the best all around IM athletes in the cuntry. I’m a regular Deion Sanders.GrundleStiltzkin said:Real talk, I really love all the stories. More please.
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High School
I ran a whip route from the slot, come out of my break as I’m catching the ball, I felt like I hit a brick wall and according to my teammates it looked like i fell in slow motion. i was out before I hit the ground. CSB s/o to our QB my JR yr.GrundleStiltzkin said:
Biglybackthepack said:
Does getting knocked by Kyler Gordon at a team camp count?GrundleStiltzkin said:backthepack said:
At my peak I may have been one of the best all around IM athletes in the cuntry. I’m a regular Deion Sanders.GrundleStiltzkin said:Real talk, I really love all the stories. More please.
