Duckfighter Illustrated: SEC Special Edition

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IT'S THE SEC'S WORLD AND WE ARE ALL JUST GUESTS

RACE BANNON

Welcome to College Football 2014, the year of the SEC West. Auburn, Alabama, LSU, Mississippi State, Ole Miss and B1G Champion, Arkansas, have dominated the landscape of college football, leaving all other teams as an afterthought. At least three of these teams should be in the Final Four of the new playoff that you might have heard something about.

This grizzled scribe is pulling for Two Loss Les Miles to win his second National Championship with his second two loss team. First he'll have to get by Nick Saban and the Alabama Crimson Tide this Saturday night in a prime time special broadcast on CBS. Meanwhile on ABC, Ohio State will be playing a weak and over rated Michigan State team in a game that no one cares about which is pretty much the case for any game not involving the SEC West. The WAC features a battle between Oregon and Utah in a possible WAC Championship preview. No one cares.

This past Saturday night the nation was glued to their TV sets watching Auburn and Mississippi battle while Arkansas and Mississippi State slugged it out which followed the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party between Georgia and Florida. Alabama and LSU took the night off to prepare for the latest installment of the greatest rivalry game in the sport today not involving Alabama playing Auburn.

Mississippi had their hearts and legs broken in a last second loss that could cost them a spot in the finals. Auburn continues to show, along with Two Loss Les, that luck is the residue of design and hard work. Nobody hits more big plays or long passes than Auburn.

The SEC is the conference of the only championship that matters and their student athletes go on to dominate NFL rosters which is why so many want to watch SEC games. Every other league looks like the junior varsity. Tune in this Saturday and enjoy the show!

(Race Bannon is not part of the widespread media conspiracy involving the SEC conference.)

MEANWHILE IN THE REAL WEST

RACE BANNON

Oregon finally over came their Stanford problem with a rousing win that nobody watched because Stanford is a four loss loser team that is a shell of the two time defending PAC 12 champions that have dominated Oregon over the years. Next up for Oregon is a soul crushing defeat sometime in the next four weeks to keep them the best team to never win anything of consequence.

Arizona State took control of the rugged PAC 12 South with a win over Utah in game that set the sport back several decades. Missed Field Goal continued his quest for the Heisman.

UCLA shut down Arizona, beating them at home rather easily. Next up for Coach Mora and his disappointing Bruins is a trip home to Seattle to whip the Dawgs in a night game that no one will watch since it is up against Bama and LSU.

Washington came out fired up after a halftime speech by Chris Petersen and battered the woeful Buffs with defense, special teams, and an anemic offense led by the worst quarterback in the league. But he's our worst quarterback in the league and we love him.

USC marched into Pullman and took the legs out from under the Cuogs as record setting quarterback Conner Halliday was finally killed in the Let's Not Protect the Quarterback offense of the innovative Mike Leach. The Cuogs are now 2-7. Imagine if they didn't have a record setting quarterback. They'd be 2-7 or something.

Oregon State lost at home to Cal on a network nobody gets, but our sources tell us that the Beavers were well coached and got more with less.

Half of the PAC 12 should be relegated to the MLS and they can take their scarves with them.

IN OTHER NEWS

PAC 12 favorite Notre Dame visits Arizona State this weekend in an elimination game for the fourth spot in the play offs, also known as the pity spot because we can't give all four to the SEC even though we should if we're honest about it...Oregon visits Utah like we said...NOGAF...Florida State survived Louisville last Thursday to remain unbeaten*...Will Muschamp saved his job for another week with a shocking upset over Georgia...Steve Spurrior walked out of his post game presser after his Cocks blew their second two touchdown lead in the fourth quarter this season...Missouri is now in the driver's seat to get blown out in the SEC Championship Game*...the real championship game and play off is the SEC West round robin...thanks for reading ya'all.